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#Funny
The Sassiest Semite
LittleMissLizz
I remember very vividly when I realized “that’s so gay” wasn’t okay to say. I was never a bigot. I was raised in a home where we loved everyone &
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Salomé Sibonex
SalomeSibonex
What I love about dog training is how human the mistakes people make are.Most people prioritize making their dog “happy” above all—above discipline, stimulation, and training.The result is pampered dogs
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Wib 'Chainsaw' Johnson
WibDoesTweets
Since it's the last day of 2020 please allow me a little self-indulgence. I want to make a thread of some of the things I've made during this shitshow of
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三月
3ysz_
thinking about how funny a mdzs!nieyao meets cql!xiyao crackfic would be........ here's my comedic take: i'm of the mind that mdzs!jgy would find cql!jgy to be kind of pathetic. cql!jgy
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David Weaver
DavidDavidweave
In 2018, I was running for office and local neighbor invited me to Pork Producers tour of facilities. We had to wear masks and booties. Zero complaints about freedoms being
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Mark Buchanan
MCBuchanan
Back in 2014, Curzon offered to show a short film I made in front of select - emphasis on select - screenings of Interstellar. My film, destined for an obscure
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ミ☆clara
mushlowstool
i saw something that was like “i ordered dans book but he hasn’t done as much promo as i wanted and he’s silent again so i want my money back”
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Bethany Brookshire
BeeBrookshire
The next time someone looks down their nose at me for writing for children and sneers at how sweet and simple it must be, I want to throw at them
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leave the capitol - exit this Roman shell 🐚
fireh9lly
my parents are watching Spaced and it really is a picture of Gen-X pathology Spaced is objectively speaking a good show. Excellently written and acted, a directorial style that was
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Idaly🍭
eedalyy
I’m pissed my dog can’t talk ik that mf funny as hell no way he wasn’t a human in his past life this really my life manhttps://twitter.com/eedalyy/status/1321955967735529473
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Absurdistwords
absurdistwords
... You say of a man who has managed to dominate an entire political party that HATED him when he showed up.https://twitter.com/jambie61/status/1303892157581996038 I just find it funny that Americans NEED
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a raconteur of repute
JohannesTEvans
fun question: if ur the only trans comedian in the room and every comedian before u has made tired jokes abt how "kids id as anything these days" or how
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Jennifer Landa
JenniferLanda
1/ Alright, I’m diving into this Frog Lady discussion because I've got time right now. [puts hair in ponytail] When the Child first ate the Frog Lady’s eggs, I gasped,
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dani⁷ 🌌 LIKES WHEN BTS LIE
dan_i_ot7
Why do people think its okay to be yelling 'HE GAY HE GAY HE GAY!' Like... idk about y'all but lil story for you, my brother is gay and I
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Tabitha McIntosh
TabitaSurge
Am trying and failing to explain to my retired-teacher father why online teaching is 5 times more exhausting than being in the classroom and now am curious myself.@PatrickCragg said it
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The Sting
TheSting17
Funny TV Story...I once made a property show for Channel 4. I was halfway through editing a show about this young couple who wanted to buy a property in Portugal.
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