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I resisted the idea of meditation for a long time for several reasons, mainly a strong distaste for anything that comes with its own insider jargon and "culture." Anything even vaguely cultlike gives me the screaming creeps.
But in my desperate "try literally anything that has ever worked for anyone" phase I did give it a shot, using the Ten Percent Happier app. The jargon continues to creep me out, but I learned something super important.
The core idea of meditation is crucial, and whether you arrive at it via meditation or something else, I think *everyone* needs it. It's not about having a "quiet mind," really. That's what I misunderstood for years.
I thought, "I will suck at meditation, because I can't make my mind blank; I'm just not physically capable of it." My epiphany came when they explained that failure was part of the process of meditating correctly. You can't really do it right if your mind doesn't wander.
Meditation is like a bicep curl for your brain, repeated exercise of a very specific mental muscle. That muscle is the one that goes "Hey, you're thinking about X. Instead, think about your breathing."
This sounds so simple it's almost stupid, but it is INTENSELY powerful. That level of awareness of your own cognitive processes: this is something that only humans can do. And something we don't do enough of. Every time you "fail," you get the chance to curl that bicep.
Every awareness that you're thinking about the "wrong" thing is a victory. Every time you go "Oh hey, I'm supposed to be following my breath and instead I'm wondering if I did my taxes right" you have SUCCESSFULLY demonstrated mindfulness. You are observing the moment.
This should not be cause for guilt, but celebration. You are Aware. You are outside your mind, observing it. You have no idea how crucial that skill is for overall mental health. And the exercise of trying to think only about your breathing is a super easy way to practice it.
Because you WILL fail. That's what I didn't understand; everyone fails at this. You can't think about nothing but breathing; minds do not work that way. It is simply a setup to allow you to watch the ways your mind wanders and practice bringing it back where you want it.
I absolutely love the idea of something where "failure" is, in and of itself, success. And more about life works this way than we realize. So I'm glad I tried it. I wonder what else I've dismissed that has more value than I've ever understood.
