Read on Twitter
Sometimes You have to love toxic parents from a distance because Toxic parents will drain your life, they feel delighted in tearing you down and causing you pain....I think it’s time to talk about it, a Thread 
Heal before having a child so your child won’t have to heal from having you as a parent, no innocent child should have to come into the world and face toxicity from the start
So let’s break down what a toxic parent is. A toxic parent is a parent who consistently behave in ways that cause guilt, fear or obligation in their children. Their actions are patterns of negative behavior that help to shape their child’s life
A lot of times, toxic parents are more concerned with their own needs before anyone else’s, they’re not concerned with if what they’re doing is damaging or harmful. You don’t hear too many apologies for their behavior, and then admitting they’re behavior is wrong is rare
Now some of you grew up with toxic parents so these characteristics that I’m about to discuss are probably familiar and triggering for you, so take a deep breath and and let’s dive in
So a lot times toxic parents are self centered, a lot of times they’re unavailable emotionally, they don’t care about things that you need, no matter how much you want them to care, the conversation always turns back to them “What about me” mentality
Toxic parents can be abusive verbally and physically. Hitting, yelling, threats, or maybe it’s a more subtle encounter like name calling, silent treatment, shifting the blame or even gaslighting
Toxic parents love to invade your privacy, they never want to allow you to make your own decisions, and a lot of times they’re very critical of any decision that you make, and this can go right into your adulthood
Toxic parents can be very manipulative, they like to play with your emotions, they’ll use guilt or shame as part of their manipulation, they’ll even hold valuable items away from you as part of their manipulation game
Toxic parents will use force to get their way and they will keeping pushing and pushing to get their way and a lot of times you’ll just give in out of frustration and even exhaustion
You can’t change someone else behavior but it’s sometimes necessary to create boundaries, creating that boundary is a step towards taking control of the situation and feeling like you have some power when before they crossed that boundary and made you feel powerless
Even as adults it’s easy to still feel overwhelmed or negatively influenced by your parents, it’s like your waiting for permission from someone to escape from that influence
But mannnn listen you gotta give your own self permission, at some people you have to stop letting them drain your life and you have to decide to take back and change your life
You probably thinking it’s hard to heal when this situation has been going on all my life and the toxic parent doesn’t see any fault in their actions, no matter how old you get they still try to influence your life
But it’s important to just get in your solitude and take time for yourself and think about how your childhood experiences shaped you and let It marinate, soak it all in
Ofcourse there is a good option to seek therapy but in the meantime I think it’s important to write your feelings down, get a diary, or a journal and write down how they made you feel, how they make you act, write down your feelings
If you have a trusted friend or family member, heavy on the word “Trusted” let them know the situation because the longer you hold it in the longer it will take a toll on your life whether you realize it or not
This process won’t be easy but a lot of times the healing process is not beautiful but the process of healing is rewarding. Talk to God about it, make an appointment with a licensed mental health professional, let the emotions and tears out
And if your a parent with children who suffered from toxic parents and you start to see some of their ways in your Parenting style, make a list of things you want to change, and write next to the items on the list the behavior or feelings you would like to show instead
Make that list a priority and choose a positive behavior from that list and keep building that list with positive behaviors and act on it, matter fact make that positive behavior a habit
“That’s just the way I am” is a dangerous mentality, healing is so beneficial and can cut off those generational curse chains. You’re not alone in this journey, but do realize that generational curse chain has to stop somewhere, why not you
