I grew up listening to Rush Limbaugh.

I certainly don't think that was a good thing for me, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't influence me in some way.

So on this day of his passing, I'd like to reflect on some of the things he "taught" me.

For some context, I was raised conservative and listened to conservative talk radio almost daily then (not always Limbaugh). At the very least, I was listening to him by ~2002, and stopped in 2008 (ages 13-19).

First and foremost, Rush taught me to recognize misogyny. Don't get me wrong, all talk radio hosts were (are) sexist, but mostly in the way that all old conservative white men are sexist.

Rush though, he was a capital "M" misogynist.

Even as a teenage boy I recognized it as distinct, relative to the other talk radio hosts. The seething hatred of women was palpable. Even among other conservative fans of his I knew, Rush was the sorta guy "you didn't want to introduce to your daughter."

Second, Rush taught me to recognize when intellectual fraudulence is hiding under thunderous performance.

This is, of course, the backbone of all conservative talk radio. But Rush is the originator of the form, and was always the best.

All talk radio hosts have a brand. Some where the intellectuals (e.g., Howie Carr), some were the emotional guys (Glenn Beck), some were the angry outsiders (Michael Savage), others were the party foot soldiers (Sean Hannity).

Rush though, he could wear all these hats.

Rush had a way of making you think you were thinking. Making you think you were engaging in critical thought when you were in truth just lapping up and regurgitating whatever he said.

Like all good propagandists, he let you lead your own performance of rationality.

Rush also perfected the insincere rhetorical that is now the lingua franca of conservatism:

Imagined persecution complexes, disguising bigotry as "telling it like it is," smugness masquerading as faux populism, and avalanches of misinformation.

Rush was Trump before Trump.

Third, Rush taught me how authoritarianism works.

I have a very distinct memory of Rush pre and post 2006 election. As a reminder, the 2006 election was when the Dems took back Congress for the first time in 12 years and ended 6 years of complete GOP control of government.

Pre 2006, *we were at war* and *you wouldn't dare question the president?*

"Traitors" (read: Democrats and brown people) question the president, but Patriots understand what *loyalty* means and *what needs to be done* in these *dangerous times*

It's hard to imagine now, but after the Dems won in a historic landslide in 2006 conservatives *turned* on Bush. They blamed him for the loss (rightfully so), and overnight he went from the *great leader* to *not a real conservative* (which is a high insult)

And I have a distinct memory of the hairpin turn from "real conservatives don't question the President" to "he never was one of us" (and a distinct memory of the cognitive dissonance).

This was my first exposure to the proverbial "we've always been at war with Eastasia."

In short, I suppose I should thank Rush Limbaugh, in the same fashion I might want to thank childhood Chickenpox for making me immune as an adult.

I have, unfortunately, found the lessons I learned above quite helpful in understanding our current political climate.