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FRASIER: If you must know, Dad, I’ve decided to run the game glitchless.
MARTIN: Aw, c’mon, Son—at least take some shortcuts by going out of bounds!
NILES: Maris always says 100% doesn’t count unless you get the true ending.
FRASIER: Wise words from the living end, herself(!)
MARTIN: Aw, c’mon, Son—at least take some shortcuts by going out of bounds!
NILES: Maris always says 100% doesn’t count unless you get the true ending.
FRASIER: Wise words from the living end, herself(!)
FRASIER: This next trick is quite the complicated maneuver, requiring a frame-perfect wallkick, so I’m going to ask for no distractions.
[CUT TO: EDDIE STARING AT FRASIER.]
FRASIER: That means you, Eddie.
[EDDIE DOESN’T MOVE.]
FRASIER: …Luckily, we have a backup strat.
[CUT TO: EDDIE STARING AT FRASIER.]
FRASIER: That means you, Eddie.
[EDDIE DOESN’T MOVE.]
FRASIER: …Luckily, we have a backup strat.
DAPHNE: I didn’t know you played video games, Dr. Crane.
NILES: Oh, I’m quite the “joystick jockey”. In fact, I just spent a handsome sum on a custom PC.
DAPHNE: Ooh, you should bring it over for a LAN party some time. I’d love to see your rig.
[NILES SPIT-TAKES]
NILES: Oh, I’m quite the “joystick jockey”. In fact, I just spent a handsome sum on a custom PC.
DAPHNE: Ooh, you should bring it over for a LAN party some time. I’d love to see your rig.
[NILES SPIT-TAKES]
FRASIER: Any luck getting Maris to join you for a game, Niles?
NILES: Oh, heavens no! She says using a keyboard makes her feel like a secretary, and she can’t work the buttons on a controller, she’s too weak to depress anything.
FRASIER: Except you—
NILES: Except me, of course.
NILES: Oh, heavens no! She says using a keyboard makes her feel like a secretary, and she can’t work the buttons on a controller, she’s too weak to depress anything.
FRASIER: Except you—
NILES: Except me, of course.
NILES: I did convince Maris to join me on stream once, though, when I was trying Call of Duty.
FRASIER: Ah, one of my favorites, I’m sad I missed it.
NILES: You didn’t miss *much*. My viewers were outraged I was playing such a violent game in front of such a “sickly child”.
FRASIER: Ah, one of my favorites, I’m sad I missed it.
NILES: You didn’t miss *much*. My viewers were outraged I was playing such a violent game in front of such a “sickly child”.
FRASIER: You know, Roz, I heard a spicy rumor you might be participating in AGDQ this year.
ROZ: Oh, god, no. I don’t want to offend your delicate sensibilities, Dr. Crane, but the only thing I’m good at speedrunning is relationships.
FRASIER: Sorry I asked!
ROZ: Oh, god, no. I don’t want to offend your delicate sensibilities, Dr. Crane, but the only thing I’m good at speedrunning is relationships.
FRASIER: Sorry I asked!
ROZ: I’m not sure, but I think I dated a speedrunner once.
FRASIER: How can you not know for certain?
ROZ: He never mentioned video games, but he seemed very into performing certain tasks with as few button presses as possible, if you know what I—
FRASIER: Okay, thats enough!
FRASIER: How can you not know for certain?
ROZ: He never mentioned video games, but he seemed very into performing certain tasks with as few button presses as possible, if you know what I—
FRASIER: Okay, thats enough!
FRASIER: I know gaming has a bit of an extremism problem, but lately the community around your channel seems particularly… Oh, how do I put this?
MARTIN: For Pete’s sake, Niles, your viewers are Nazis!
NILES: I’ll admit, the chat does get very active when I stream to Wagner.
MARTIN: For Pete’s sake, Niles, your viewers are Nazis!
NILES: I’ll admit, the chat does get very active when I stream to Wagner.
FRASIER: Not what possible reason could you have for tendering your resignation as moderator of the Discord?
NILES: Nobody loves a good ribbing more than I, but it’s been *days* since my innocent typo, yet everyone is *still* responding to everything I say with, “Mario Krat”.
NILES: Nobody loves a good ribbing more than I, but it’s been *days* since my innocent typo, yet everyone is *still* responding to everything I say with, “Mario Krat”.
FRASIER: Perhaps you could just ask some of the other moderators to enforce better behavior.
NILES: I did. They changed the channel topic to “Mario Krat”.
FRASIER: Ridiculous. What kind of humor-deficient Neanderthal would find that funny?
MARTIN [LAUGHING]: Mario Krat!
NILES: I did. They changed the channel topic to “Mario Krat”.
FRASIER: Ridiculous. What kind of humor-deficient Neanderthal would find that funny?
MARTIN [LAUGHING]: Mario Krat!
MARTIN: Ah, I’m sorry, Son, I shouldn’t laugh. We gamers have to stick together.
FRASIER: Oh, come now, Dad, I hardly think your Candy Crush addiction qualifies you as a *true* gamer.
FRASIER: Oh, come now, Dad, I hardly think your Candy Crush addiction qualifies you as a *true* gamer.
NILES: Frasier, how dare you so blithely disregard our father’s skills?
MARTIN: Thank you, Niles.
NILES: Why, just yesterday I witnessed him make a move that was declared “Sodalicious!”
[NILES AND FRASIER ATTEMPT TO STIFLE GIGGLES.]
MARTIN: Thank you, Niles.
NILES: Why, just yesterday I witnessed him make a move that was declared “Sodalicious!”
[NILES AND FRASIER ATTEMPT TO STIFLE GIGGLES.]
MARTIN: Oh, I get it. Your old dad is just a “filthy casual”, is that it? Well, you boys might go pretty hard when you’re in front of your computers, but let me ask you something—can you play your game anywhere? Even when you’re on the toilet?
[SILENCE.]
MARTIN: I thought so.
[SILENCE.]
MARTIN: I thought so.
MARTIN: But I bought you the costumes!
FRASIER: Dad, I’m sure the last thing my viewers want to see is two grown men dressed-up as the Mario Brothers.
NILES: Well said.
DAPHNE: What a shame… I always had a soft spot for that Luigi.
NILES: Although maybe we’re being too hasty.
FRASIER: Dad, I’m sure the last thing my viewers want to see is two grown men dressed-up as the Mario Brothers.
NILES: Well said.
DAPHNE: What a shame… I always had a soft spot for that Luigi.
NILES: Although maybe we’re being too hasty.
FRASIER: You seem in good spirits, Dad.
MARTIN: I’ll say—I finally beat that old game you gave me.
FRASIER: Wonderful! Though I think you mean that you “completed” it.
MARTIN: What’s the difference?
FRASIER: The original conditions of play didn’t include the ability to save, so…
MARTIN: I’ll say—I finally beat that old game you gave me.
FRASIER: Wonderful! Though I think you mean that you “completed” it.
MARTIN: What’s the difference?
FRASIER: The original conditions of play didn’t include the ability to save, so…
MARTIN: You’re telling me that even though I found all the secrets, and emptied every dungeon, and made my way to the final boss and killed him… None of that counts, because I hit “save” once in a while?
FRASIER: They’re not my rules—
MARTIN: Ah, “save” your breath.
FRASIER: They’re not my rules—
MARTIN: Ah, “save” your breath.
FRASIER: Forget what I think, or, indeed, what the initial developers intended for the player. If you consider yourself to have won a victory against this game… I suppose I shouldn’t argue.
MARTIN: Oh, how big of you(!) Now—are there any more games with this Zelda guy?
MARTIN: Oh, how big of you(!) Now—are there any more games with this Zelda guy?
NILES: Actually, Dad, Zelda is the Princess.
MARTIN: I guess it takes one to know one.
MARTIN: I guess it takes one to know one.
