It's freezing in Dallas because of Global Warming.

I know that sound's counterintuitive, but it's true. There's a thing called the Jet Stream, a highspeed river of air and F-22 fighter jets that acts as a sort of atmospheric barrier wall between the Continental US and Canada. 1/

Normally, this barrier of highspeed air drags on arctic pressures fronts and keeps that frigid winter air locked away in Canada, where it belongs. They know what they did. However, as the planet has warmed due to human activity, the Jet Stream has been disrupted and weakened. 2/

As a result, the cold, dense, asshole Canadian air is pushing against a thinner, more elastic barrier wall. Like a Slipknot mosh pit pushing against the security hired for a Peter, Paul, and Mary concert. The line can't hold. 3/

So instead of keeping everything in its proper place, the Jet Stream is getting pushed around like a hall monitor with a peanut allergy and suddenly we have sea turtles freezing off the coast of Galveston. This is why climatologists started calling it "Climate Change," btw. 4/

Because it wouldn't be as simple as everywhere getting warmer. The disruptions to our climate and environmental systems were going to be chaotic and unpredictable. In some places a global average of warming would mean floods, in others drought, in others... unprecedented cold. 5/

And yet still politicians rush to protect the very legacy industries that profited off creating this crisis. Dying industries, btw. Not because of "Crippling government regulations" but simple free market forces. Fossil fuels have lost their free market edge, even subsidized. 6/

In many markets, new wind and solar capacity is already cheaper than coal or NG, despite the fact they don't have powerful lobbies pumping billions in tax subsidies and low-cost extraction rights to artificially prop them up in the market. 7/

Instead, we're being forced to waste billions of taxpayer dollars and lost tax revenue on dying industries that are already a fraction of the US job market compared to the alternatives. Green energy creates jobs. Fossil Fuels kill people. Not a difficult choice. 8/8