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Periodic reminder: Your submission is personal to you. You don't have to conform to stereotypes or some idealised vision of what a submissive should be.
If anyone tries to compromise limits, safety or well-being by accusing you of "not being a real sub" etc, get out or seek help.
If anyone tries to compromise limits, safety or well-being by accusing you of "not being a real sub" etc, get out or seek help.
You're not a blank slate for someone's fantasies. You're not a project or a template.
You don't have to confirm to any vision of what a submissive 'should' be.
Do your own research, be consensual, be risk-aware, communicate well & do what works for you & the person(s) you're with
You don't have to confirm to any vision of what a submissive 'should' be.
Do your own research, be consensual, be risk-aware, communicate well & do what works for you & the person(s) you're with
Submissives/bottoms/littles/etc. are not automatons, they are not templates for development or projects for dominants to work on.
They are people with needs and wants of their own.
Power may be exchanged but everyone should be equally fulfilled.
They are people with needs and wants of their own.
Power may be exchanged but everyone should be equally fulfilled.
PS: terms like 'true submissive' or 'real submissive' are basically meaningless anyway as there's no One True Way to do BDSM, D/s or kink
Just be consensual & aware of risks, communicate well with your partner(s), do your research, & do what's right for you & whoever you're with
Just be consensual & aware of risks, communicate well with your partner(s), do your research, & do what's right for you & whoever you're with
PPS: @BexTalksSex, has created an utterly brilliant 'Yes/No/Maybe' tool to help discussions about what people may or may not want to do in sex and kink.
I cannot recommend it enough. http://www.bextalkssex.com/yes-no-maybe/
I cannot recommend it enough. http://www.bextalkssex.com/yes-no-maybe/
I'll stop with the PS's now but one final thing: all of the above applies to dominants too, to any other kink role in fact. This is all personal to you. https://twitter.com/Master_Venture/status/1361716814431010816?s=19
