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I'll now share my sex appeal rankings for supernatural creatures.
VAMPIRE 9/10
-Cool, confident, and into what they’re doing
-Sucking on you is extremely important to them!
-Can get really dark and still be hot
-Look I’m just a queer goth with an oral fixation
VAMPIRE 9/10
-Cool, confident, and into what they’re doing
-Sucking on you is extremely important to them!
-Can get really dark and still be hot
-Look I’m just a queer goth with an oral fixation
TENTACLE MONSTER 7/10
-They’ll never manufacture a sex toy with this much potential
-Swirly, clingy tendrils are pretty, let's be real!
-Good for dubcon/noncon, but "CONSENTACLES" is an A+ portmanteau
-I personally favor marine monsters because the sea is the GOAT
-They’ll never manufacture a sex toy with this much potential
-Swirly, clingy tendrils are pretty, let's be real!
-Good for dubcon/noncon, but "CONSENTACLES" is an A+ portmanteau
-I personally favor marine monsters because the sea is the GOAT
Zombie 3/10
-After the 2nd stage of decomposition, it’s just kind of hard to sell
-Not saying it can’t be done!
-Just very dead
-After the 2nd stage of decomposition, it’s just kind of hard to sell
-Not saying it can’t be done!
-Just very dead
Werewolves 8/10
-Sometimes you just need like GRRRR! WRRAAAUGH!!!
-Will never kink shame you!!!
-They hang out in the woods and woods are hot!!1
-They wanna devour but also protect and it makes them MAD!!!
-Sometimes you just need like GRRRR! WRRAAAUGH!!!
-Will never kink shame you!!!
-They hang out in the woods and woods are hot!!1
-They wanna devour but also protect and it makes them MAD!!!
MER-PERSON 5/10
-Extremely cool but the logistics are...fishy, I'm sorry
-I imagine 10 seconds of seduction then oh fuck I’m drowning!
-No disrespect, but I’m just not there with it at this time
-Extremely cool but the logistics are...fishy, I'm sorry
-I imagine 10 seconds of seduction then oh fuck I’m drowning!
-No disrespect, but I’m just not there with it at this time
DEMON 6/10
-Serial killer energy.
-Great in theory, but rarely as memorable as you hope.
-They seem kind of mean, like in a bully way?
-Serial killer energy.
-Great in theory, but rarely as memorable as you hope.
-They seem kind of mean, like in a bully way?
SOFT GHOST 5/10
-It's not that they're not hot, just that they're kind of a downer?
-You can explore no-contact sex though, so I respect that
-If the ghost is just an excuse for atmospheric prose porn, +2 POINTS
-It's not that they're not hot, just that they're kind of a downer?
-You can explore no-contact sex though, so I respect that
-If the ghost is just an excuse for atmospheric prose porn, +2 POINTS
SCARY GHOST 6/10
-Closer to vampire territory, i.e. better
-So many intriguing folklore characters to choose from!
-You will end up possessed or dead though, just to be clear
-Closer to vampire territory, i.e. better
-So many intriguing folklore characters to choose from!
-You will end up possessed or dead though, just to be clear
ANGEL 7/10
-Beautiful & divine + weird & terrifying is a hot contrast
-Come for the arcane powers, stay for the feather play
-If tormented and/or vengeful, +1 point.
-Beautiful & divine + weird & terrifying is a hot contrast
-Come for the arcane powers, stay for the feather play
-If tormented and/or vengeful, +1 point.
SWAMP THING 9/10
-Definitely queer and up for it, you can't tell me different
-Conscious elemental life forms are hot!
-Just seems nice
- Remember when Charlemagne wanted to fuck his swamp? You say untrue, I say shhhh: https://twitter.com/erik_kaars/status/1233423445981089794?s=21
-Definitely queer and up for it, you can't tell me different
-Conscious elemental life forms are hot!
-Just seems nice
- Remember when Charlemagne wanted to fuck his swamp? You say untrue, I say shhhh: https://twitter.com/erik_kaars/status/1233423445981089794?s=21
ENT 10/10
-Mostly a matter of principle
-Excellent woodsy fragrance
-Polished hardwood, soft moss, yum
-We stan trees here
BLOB 3/10
-Boring, unclear motives
-Slimy, gross
-Hard to interact with
-Danger of suffocation
-Mostly a matter of principle
-Excellent woodsy fragrance
-Polished hardwood, soft moss, yum
-We stan trees here
BLOB 3/10
-Boring, unclear motives
-Slimy, gross
-Hard to interact with
-Danger of suffocation
DRAGON 3/10
-Too many sharp, stabby, dangerously hot surfaces!
-Would love to have one in my life, just not DTF
-Too many sharp, stabby, dangerously hot surfaces!
-Would love to have one in my life, just not DTF
CENTAUR 4/10
-1 point for each hoof, that’s the best I can do
-I love the smell of horses but I wouldn’t call it erotic
-Change my view on this, I know it's a thing!
-1 point for each hoof, that’s the best I can do
-I love the smell of horses but I wouldn’t call it erotic
-Change my view on this, I know it's a thing!
FANCY ELF 7/10
-Hot in a bougie way that is both tiresome and hard to resist
-Extremely good at things, which surely includes sex
-You know they've got a LUSH hangout
-The first fanfic I ever read was two fancy LOTR elves, and it was good!
-Hot in a bougie way that is both tiresome and hard to resist
-Extremely good at things, which surely includes sex
-You know they've got a LUSH hangout
-The first fanfic I ever read was two fancy LOTR elves, and it was good!
WOODLAND ELF 9/10
-Hot in that sensual, ominous, enchanted forest type of way
-Mischievous trickster with a sinister edge, kill me
-Might turn you into a bird or something but it'll be worth it
-Hot in that sensual, ominous, enchanted forest type of way
-Mischievous trickster with a sinister edge, kill me
-Might turn you into a bird or something but it'll be worth it
SASQUATCH 1/10
-No disrespect!!!
-I love sasquatch deeply, but
-Just like, really, the smell
-No disrespect!!!
-I love sasquatch deeply, but
-Just like, really, the smell
SKELETON 4/10
-Cooler than zombies, but still super dead
-Presumably a lot of creaking and rattling involved?
-If sharply dressed a la Jack Skellington, +4 POINTS
-Cooler than zombies, but still super dead
-Presumably a lot of creaking and rattling involved?
-If sharply dressed a la Jack Skellington, +4 POINTS
FAIR FOLK 10/10
-Can have any best attribute of any other creature
-Will charm you whether you like it or not
-Max score so they don’t come for me
-Can have any best attribute of any other creature
-Will charm you whether you like it or not
-Max score so they don’t come for me
SELKIE 8/10
-Sleek, mysterious, smells like the ocean
-Can go with the flow, by land or sea
-There to erotically comfort you when you’re lonely on the beach
-Sleek, mysterious, smells like the ocean
-Can go with the flow, by land or sea
-There to erotically comfort you when you’re lonely on the beach
That's all for now. I will return when I've fantasized about more supernatural creatures.
KAPPA 6/10
-Who can resist a malevolent trickster with good manners?
-Just bring cucumbers to ensure good relations
-Horny water spirits will never score below 5 in my book
-Who can resist a malevolent trickster with good manners?
-Just bring cucumbers to ensure good relations
-Horny water spirits will never score below 5 in my book
POLTERGEIST 4/10
-Hard to build a real rapport or chemistry
-If the spirit is unknown, the unpredictability would be a bit nerve-wracking
-Could just as well wear a blindfold and earplugs to a gang bang, no?
-Hard to build a real rapport or chemistry
-If the spirit is unknown, the unpredictability would be a bit nerve-wracking
-Could just as well wear a blindfold and earplugs to a gang bang, no?
DEATH 7/10
-I feel like when Death fucks, Death
FUCKS
-Grim Reaper robes? Hot. Skinny black suits? Hot.
-Could earn yourself some extra time; if not, might as well go out coming
-I feel like when Death fucks, Death
FUCKS-Grim Reaper robes? Hot. Skinny black suits? Hot.
-Could earn yourself some extra time; if not, might as well go out coming
TROLL 6/10
-Oddly endearing, if difficult to read
-"Slow but powerful" is generally a promising sensual combo
-Accidental crushing seems like a real danger
-Oddly endearing, if difficult to read
-"Slow but powerful" is generally a promising sensual combo
-Accidental crushing seems like a real danger
GOBLIN 7/10
-Crass and crude, yes, but don’t forget sly and cunning
-Would probably return to haunt your dreams with gleeful whispers of all the nasty things you did
-Nothing like being simultaneously appalled and aroused!
-Crass and crude, yes, but don’t forget sly and cunning
-Would probably return to haunt your dreams with gleeful whispers of all the nasty things you did
-Nothing like being simultaneously appalled and aroused!
SATAN 6/10
-Obviously knows a thing or two about getting nasty
-Then again, people with this much power can be boring
-Might demand soul in exchange for satisfaction
-At worst, could devolve into some Pinhead-type shit
-Obviously knows a thing or two about getting nasty
-Then again, people with this much power can be boring
-Might demand soul in exchange for satisfaction
-At worst, could devolve into some Pinhead-type shit
BANSHEE 3/10
-Mournful shrieking is distracting, not at all arousing
-Just too scary and depressing overall
-1 point added for excellent aesthetic & character, though
-Mournful shrieking is distracting, not at all arousing
-Just too scary and depressing overall
-1 point added for excellent aesthetic & character, though
GARGOYLES 8/10
-Where is the gargoyle fiction? Send it my way
-Stoic, mystical, sinister but STEADFAST
-90s children, did we not all thirst a bit for:
-Where is the gargoyle fiction? Send it my way
-Stoic, mystical, sinister but STEADFAST
-90s children, did we not all thirst a bit for:
