Rating beers: A thread

Coors Light:

Dubbed ‘the world’s most refreshing beer’, it’s also one of the world’s worst

With a weak taste, perhaps they need to stop focusing on making the bottle go blue when it’s been in the fridge for 8 hours and focus more on delivering a better flavour.

(2/10)

Budweiser:

An American beer which tastes a bit too sweet.

Very rare to hear in a pub “I’ll have a pint of Budweiser please” And for good reason...

I challenge you to find any supermarket which won’t have an offer on for a 16 bottle case of this below-par brew.

(3/10)

Birra Moretti:

You can’t go wrong with this Italian Stallion

Grab a pint on draught and you won’t be disappointed. Packs enough of a punch while retaining a smooth texture and taste. Attractive option for sunny beer garden weather

(8/10)

Carlsberg:

This beer used to sponsor Liverpool, and much like the football club, this Danish drink is on the decline

A smooth yet weak beverage, with it often being slandered alongside its partner-in-crime Carling (more on that later), I’d give this one a miss

(3/10)

Amstel:

A solid beer, lovely on draught. This dynamic Dutch lager commands respect.

Okay, it can’t quite compete with the dizzying heights of the top tier beers, but the flavour is bang on, and with a pint of this in your hand you’ll know you’re doing alright.

(7/10)

Fosters:

Bad call.

It’s a yes for price and refreshment, but a bottle of Highland Spring is refreshing, and this doesn’t taste far off water. And when you want a beer, you want a beer, not water.

Especially not piss-water.

(2/10)

Heineken:

This beer reminds me of a couple things, green bottles and the Champions League

As it comes, this beer is decent. The calming, if not spectacular flavour can go down a right treat. This is a brew with substance, and a hint of presence.

(7/10)

Becks:

I haven’t seen this beer since about 2008, does anyone know if it still exists?

And since I was too young to drink in 2008, I am unable to give you a rating for this one. I imagine it can’t be too good, or else I would’ve at least known it’s still in circulation.

(N/A)

Carling:

A real joker of the pack. What do we make of this one? The beer is synonymous with British culture. It’s actually brewed in England for starters, it has local roots. The pint glasses are also superb if you’ve come across one.

However, it’s weak. Very very weak

(3/10)

Stella Artois:

A superb, hard-hitting beer. Have a few of these and you will know about it.

Marketed in the UK as being high-end. However, speak to anyone in Belgium and they will describe Stella as simply being bang-average

Don’t listen to them, this is top stuff.

(9/10)

Estrella:

This is likely to divide opinion, as some people swear by it.

An interesting lager, with its technical taste splitting opinion. I myself find the beer to be a bit heavy, with other options walking-the-walk far better than this big-talking brew.

(6/10)

Kronenbourg:

Up there with the best of them, this beer holds its own.

Lovely texture and taste, slightly expensive but strong in delivery. A pint of this stuff is good gear. Multipack bottles on sale in shops slightly too small (250ml)

(8/10)

Corona:

Name mudded by the virus, this beer is slightly high-maintenance.

After all, which other beer requires a f*cking lime on top? We don’t all have limes lying around the house to chop up! This offering on draught remains a rare sight.

(6/10)

Red Stripe:

Bob Marley and festivals.

Light and fresh-tasting beer, if not a little lightweight. Tiny little bottles and cans a regular occurrence.

However, there are worse ones out there, and a Red Stripe definitely has its place: Half-cut at Glastonbury

(7/10)

Bud Light:

Bud Light??? More like Bud Sh*te!!!

(1/10)

Peroni:

Beautiful beer.

Pubs can’t serve it unless approved by a member of the company, this is serious level stuff.

Everything you want in a beer: crisp, light yet flavoursome. High-priced but worth the expenditure.

(10/10)

Warsteiner:

Becoming a more regular presence in supermarkets, when I tried this I was left with no complaints. One to watch for sure.

It carries a punch, strong in flavour and full in depth. Perhaps space to grow and develop the British palate.

(7/10)

Asahi:

A real one to watch, one of the crispest beers I have enjoyed.

The flavour is not compromised by the lightness. Carling and Fosters look in despair at this Asian asset. It is indeed everything they want to be, and everything they’re not.

(8/10)

Singha/Cobra/Kingfisher/Chang

Indian restaurant merchants. Almost strange to drink these outside the realms of a tikka masala.

However, with a curry I am pretty sure nothing comes close than this foursome. They aren’t going anywhere

(7/10)

San Miguel:

Not too bad, sometimes hides behind the veracity of other brands

San Miguel is just there. A calm beer which combines well with the sun. Blends into the background though as the taste doesn’t reach out and grab you where it hurts.

(5/10)

Grolsch:

Ooh look at me with my funny little bottle-top!

(4/10)

Sol:

Sun merchant.

Had it once, instantly forgettable. People who drinks these often seem to love dumping empty ones on the floor, because I see more glass bottles of these than any of the others.

(3/10)

Desperados:

A bit of a wild one. The tequila element adds a bit of intrigue.

However, just like composing this Twitter thread, just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Not enough on offer to place this beer high on the ratings.

(3/10)

And finally, Hop House 13:

A little bit different, and I respect it.

The fruity taste demands attention, but the brewing quality of the Guinness factory is in full-view here.

Retains its punch from bottle to draught. Well worth a try if not aware

(7/10)