Read on Twitter
Hmm
Let’s see
When was the last time I was hurt or humiliated? https://twitter.com/qiaochuyuan/status/1361108198862721024
Let’s see
When was the last time I was hurt or humiliated? https://twitter.com/qiaochuyuan/status/1361108198862721024
Humiliated: when I was answering “why wouldn’t your team just leave you if you don’t do anything” on Clubhouse and somebody summarized as “so what I hear is ‘hire people who don’t know English’”
Well, maybe more like ashamed, but still
Why did that happen? Because I don’t have a good understanding for why I bring value
But *also* because I didn’t fight back
Why did that happen? Because I don’t have a good understanding for why I bring value
But *also* because I didn’t fight back
However, a bigger point is “why is being humiliated so bad”, and the funny thing is that it’s not even remotely as bad as it was half a year ago. But still not great
The answer is “because if I’m bad, I must change”. And changing for myself is alright. But HEAVEN FORBID I change for the society
This explains AT LAST why for years I disliked my family
They were the closest agents of the society who wanted me to change
They were the closest agents of the society who wanted me to change
I had to run away from someone and I thought it was because she created drama and all that drama began because she had expectations
I can rephrase it
She wanted me to change and tried to coerce me into changing
I can rephrase it
She wanted me to change and tried to coerce me into changing
And I hate changing for other people
I hate it, hate it, hate it
It’s the worst thing and it’s so shitty that I tried to inflict it on my ex-girlfriend
I hate it, hate it, hate it
It’s the worst thing and it’s so shitty that I tried to inflict it on my ex-girlfriend
I do like the society and want to cooperate
*and* I will not be the society’s bitch
*and* I will not be the society’s bitch
You don’t have to be a bitch of someone you like
I really like the society
I think it’s genuinely a great thing to have happened
Other people are great
But submitting to it — no, never
I can cooperate, I don’t have to submit
I think it’s genuinely a great thing to have happened
Other people are great
But submitting to it — no, never
I can cooperate, I don’t have to submit
And it would be a disaster if I had to submit or if anybody I liked had to submit
Being a slave of the society
Bleh
Being a slave of the society
Bleh
I feel at peace
I was 25 years old today when I figured out what I want my relationship with the society to be
I was 25 years old today when I figured out what I want my relationship with the society to be
And you know what
I think it’s partly the society that demands I don’t die, in some roundabout way
I think it’s partly the society that demands I don’t die, in some roundabout way
Like.. I want to have fun forever, but I’m also obligated to make the world better and until I’ve done so I am not allowed to die
“Don’t go away, I still need you to save me”
“Don’t go away, I still need you to save me”
( @QiaochuYuan thanks
This is a very important thread for me and you served as a canvas for making it happen)
This is a very important thread for me and you served as a canvas for making it happen)
