I can’t stop imagining Philip K Dick as a Disney Parks Vlogger.

“Welcome all sentient beings and biological automatons. Follow me as I spend yet another day worshipping at this Temple of Artifice we know as Disneyland. An artificial escape hatch built within our artificial prison dimension. Animatronic turtles all the way down.”

“Of course the Matterhorn is a real mountain! We call it a mountain. It looks like a mountain. Being built of rebar and concrete does not diminish its inherent “mountain-ness.” To a child visiting from the plains of Kansas, is this not the REALEST mountain they have ever seen?”

“Through the monotonous repetition of daily life, the Archons program us into endless behavior loops. This is the nature of the Black Iron Prison. A cruel irony that they should choose “the great emancipator” to illustrate their plans.”

“The world we live in is dangerous and painful so we create a false river of false dangers and we float down it in order to build up false courage. Heart disease and car collisions will not wiggle their ears as a warning. They’re always just below the water with mouth wide open.”

“Tarzan’s Treehouse? Tarzan?! But surely my own memories tell me it was built by the Swiss Family Robinson. Was I remembering a universe long since erased? Each night when we sleep is the world overwritten with an inferior facsimile? And what worth are my memories at all?”

“With each repetition of the phrase ‘It’s a small world after all’ reality loses dimensionality. i find my own body transforming into a plywood cutout. around the next bend I will discover this life was only ever a picture book illustration. then a heiroglyph. a bare rock wall.”

“They call it the ‘Haunted Mansion’, but it’s the ghosts’ house. We are the ones doing the haunting! A microcosm of the physical world. Our bodies breeze in and out so quickly that history will barely notice we were ever there.”

“We are always on the Galaxy’s Edge. Wherever or whenever we are. America, Rome, The First Order. All window dressing to make us falsely believe that time marches forward. The Empire Never Ends.”

“I’ve searched this universe of lies for one who might know the truth. My journey has led me to this humble storefront and to a single cold blooded entrepreneur willing to sell answers to this world’s illusions.”

“Beneath a stack of instruction books for sleight of hand trickery was one booked that labeled itself as fiction, but I intuitively knew it to be truth. Was it placed here by mistake? Would the clerk agree to sell it to me? Not wanting to risk it I placed it in my coat and ran.”