I keep returning to this tweet and each time I do, I re-read it and it offends me even more. https://twitter.com/mattwallaert/status/1360606475345829890

It offends me, not because I am a left-wing gender critical feminist - I’m not. I’m a centre right liberal - a moderate Tory who is small-c conservative on many many issues. I am not in the least “radical” (though I admire many radicals and think we need them).

This tweet offends me because I am a father of a daughter, and because what this shows is that gender ideology is based on coercion and emotional blackmail.

It says, literally, the role of girls is to validate men. Men’s feelings trump the rights of women and girls.

As I said, I’m not exactly a tub-thumping feminist. I just happen to believe it is NOT the role of women to validate men, but to be the best they can be as free and equal citizens, and that were there isn’t freedom and equality, to demand it and make it happen.

Women will NEVER be free and equal if they grow up believing subliminally that their role is, at its heart, to validate men.

This tweet is basically about as anti-women as you can possibly be, but it is hidden within the “be kind” message.

This “be kind” message is the same message used when horny males utter “if you loved me, you have sex with me”, or “please don’t leave me, I need you”. It’s manipulative, coercive and utterly wrong.

Transpeople have a right to expect support, respect and understanding from the rest of society. But this cannot be arrived at by coercion.

Some of the fiercest critics of transpeople are oddly those who would in other circumstances be their greatest allies.

Feminism has a lot in common with those who advocate for transrights, but extreme Trans-ideology (the guff which is like a religion) alienates because it “demands” and “imposes”.

This tweet is a perfect example of such an extreme.

Transpeople should be respected and supported. But they should not seek (and should be allowed) to impose. There are good reasons why sport is separated by sex - and those are on the grounds of safety, fairness and respecting women’s dignity.

To teach your daughter to compromise her safety, right to fairness and dignity in order to “be kind” to Transwomen is wrong philosophically and ethically. Transwomen are not women, they are biologically male, physiologically and almost always physically male.

Women must, as an absolute inviolable right, have the power to politely refuse to integrate male people into places which are theirs, and set-up for their safety, security and dignity (such as sport).

To preserve women’s rights is not being anti-trans. It’s is being pro-women.

So, my message to my daughter is this (as she knows): do not compromise yourself. You already suffer unfair prejudice as a result of your sex. Do not allow yourself to suffer further prejudice just to validate men. Assert and expect respect - and allow your no to remain a no.

And my message to Matt: forget “sex/gender” for a mo, & and imagine your child competing in a sport separated by ability, weight, or strength (like boxing) and a stronger, more powerful player who simply “identifies” as a weaker player was allowed to compete against your child.

Imagine they win, not because they train harder or are more dedicated, but just because nature has given them greater biologist advances. Now image the same player injures your child.

What is your message to your child then?