1/
#WhatsYourWhy

Grady elevator

Her: "Is that my girl Dr. Manning?"
Me: "Heeeey! I haven't seen you in a minute!"

*elbow bump*

Her: "I ain't used to seeing you with scrubs on and not in your heels!"
Me: "Girrrrl. It's crushing my soul to not wear heels!"

*laughter*

2/
Her: "At first I didn't even know that was you! And you grew your hair some."
Me: "And you changed your hair, too. I like it!"
Her: "Girl, this a wig."

*laughter*

Her: *patting head* "The #COVID makeover, chile."
Me: *nodding* "I know that's right."

*silence*

3/
Me: "Hey--you get the #COVIDVaccine yet?"
Her: "Nah."
Me: *raising eyebrows*
Her: "I decided to wait."

I jutted out my lip under my mask and nodded.

Her: "I'm in my 30's. And nobody older or sick live with me. So I'm waiting."
Me: *squinting* "Waiting for. . . ?"

4/
Her phone rang, blasting a rap song. She held up a finger to me. She spoke quickly to what sounded like a teenager and hung up.

Her: "Sorry 'bout that."
Me: "You said you waiting. So. . .like, you waiting to see what happens with other people or. . . ?"

The elevator pinged.

5/
We both stepped out and stood in the vestibule as the doors closed behind us. She didn't appear to be in a hurry.

I was glad.

Her: "Oh. That. Yeah, nah, I read up on it. I just decided I'm gon' wait for the Johnson & Johnson one."

Wait. What?

I didn't see that coming.

6/
Holding out for the J&J vaccine? Honestly, I'd been preparing myself for people to push back against this one. Not wait for it.

Hmm.

Me: "Yeah?"
Her: "Yeah. I don't like shots. AT. ALL. So I'm gon' go with the one-shot one instead."
Me: *listening*

7/
Her: "It's a hassle to get scheduled twice. Plus I seen people feel bad after they get vaccinated and I ain't got time to feel bad twice." *shaking head*
Me: "I hear you. My arm was just sore with the first one. But I did feel like a mini-flu for a day or 2 with the 2nd."

8/
Her: "Yeah. I know some people that ain't hardly felt nothing. But some other folk got knocked down with both of 'em. Girl, I ain't trying to go through all that."

I thought about what she'd said earlier about being young and not having high risk people at home.

But still.

9/
Me: "You know I'm standing here trying to think of what to say next."
Her: "Girl, you know we know you. I'm like, 'Lawd, she 'bout to tell me I need to get it right now and not wait.'"

*laughter*

Me: "I'm just thinking about you being protected."
Her: "I hear you."

10/
Her: "I really thought about it though, Dr. Manning. I'm for real."
Me: *listening*
Her: "Like, first--I hate needles. Like pass-out hate 'em. So 2 shots is a big deal for me."
Me: *nodding*
Her: "Plus I can't chance being down 2 different times. It'd be just my damn luck."

11/
Her: "And I read up on it. Like--my big concern is 'bout getting super sick where I gotta go to the hospital. And even though this one don't stop you getting infected as good, it DOES do a good job with you not being in a ICU somewhere."
Me: *slow nod*
Her: "Right?"

12/
Me: *shrug* "You right. Spot on, sis."
Her: "Exactly. And since they ain't got to keep it super cold and it's easier to make, it's probably not gon' be hard to get. And I'm not like caring for patients like y'all."

Her phone rang again. She rolled her eyes and silenced it.

13/
Me: "Your kids?"
Her: "Girl. These kids need to go back to somebody's school so they can stop calling me and eating all my food."

*laughter*

Me: *thinking* "Dang. I slept on you, sis. You all up on these facts."
Her: "Girl, I betta be! This my life!"

14/
Her: *laughing* "And I saw your video on the other vaccines--I know this one work a little different."
Me: "Come on, little Fauci!"

*laughter*

Her: "Yeah, girl. I like knowing."

*silence*

Me: "But . . . you cool with waiting?"
Her: "Yeah. I think I'm someone who can."

15/
Me: "Okay."
Her: *raising a brow* "Okay?"
Me: "Yep. Okay."

*laughter*

Her: "Alright then, Dr. Manning."
Me: "Alright then, friend."

*elbow bump*

Her: "You know what I recently noticed?"
Me: "What's that?"
Her: "Nobody call it 'The Rona' no more."

She didn't laugh.

16/
Me: *thinking* "You know? That's true."
Her: "Yeah. I guess when you got damn near 500,00 folk dead from something, you put some respect on what you call it."

I nodded in deference. Her phone rang again and we laughed. She waved and we parted ways.

And that was it.

17/
Truth:

My own #implicitbias caused me to underestimate her informed personal decision--and her comprehensive knowledge about her #COVIDVaccine options.

Damn.

I think she KNEW I did, too. But still extended me grace.

You know? I bet a lot of people do that with doctors.

18/
Yeah. . . .

Fear of needles.
Preference of a single dose vaccine.
And a full understanding of what that means to her life.

These were her reasons.
Hers.

And no. Doctors aren't the only ones who like knowing--or the only ones who know.

#BlackWhysMatter