How The Pandemic Drastically Altered My Life & Helped Me Find God Again

This one is personal.

—Thread—

March 12th, 2020.

The country locks down.

We head into isolation from something we cannot see, but something we fear & know is there.

I was unaware of the dark valley I was entering.

I stayed up late & woke up late.

Started schoolwork around 4 pm & did it sloppily.

Didn't care anymore.

Suddenly, school was nothing.

As I stopped caring about my grades, I stopped caring about every other aspect of my life.

No exercise, 1 meal a day, completely isolated.

2 weeks went by.

I was sent to a psychologist.

Diagnosed with depression.

A big defeat for myself.

It didn't help knowing I was depressed, it only made my condition worse.

I lost 5 kilograms of weight.

I didn't even want to make eye contact with myself in the mirror.

It reached the point where it didn't matter if I suffered a heart attack and died.

It would make no difference to my mental state at that point.

I was a failure & my parents were disappointed and afraid.

I felt left alone by God.

I felt like He had given me enough chances.

One night while I was laying in my bed contemplating the darkness, I felt something.

I need to read the Bible.

That feeling cannot be explained into words.

So I started reading Ecclesiastes & Proverbs.

My heart was filled with immense love & joy. A feeling I've never felt.

God heard my outcry & answered my prayers.

I found meaning.

I found hope.

God gave me a purpose.

I started reading the Bible more often.

I also started exercising and eating more often.

A routine amid insecure times made my mental state better.

God gave me hope again.

I started living more productively.

Read tons of books.

Classics, biographies, poems, essays, short stories, everything.

Art, literature, architecture and classical music were the things I was interested in.

Not video games, Netflix and YouTube (things that drained energy).

Looking back at how things were before the pandemic, I see something peculiar.

I was happy, yes—but I was unaware of how little I knew about myself.

I had no purpose, yet, I was happy.

I didn't know God the way I do now.

For the adversity I faced made me the person I am.

I am now fully committed to achieving my purpose & bettering my connection with God.

I exercise four times a week, & I am happy with who I am.

The pandemic broke me, but shaped me.

If it was God's will, then I am thankful.

I now know who I am.

I now know what I want.

Thank you.

My followers have made my life better.

RT & like. https://twitter.com/piousartist/status/1360391227225616386