i keep thinking abt how writing "ownvoices" might not always be as simple and straightforward as it's often understood in online discourse

(short thread, CW for abuse (physical and emotional), and rape)

i may not be the italian immigrant i'm writing my story about, living in 1930s' new york getting caught up in shady stuff (none of us are)

but i have been living as a hungarian immigrant in western europe.

i'm lucky now, i have a uni degree and a good job.

but when i first moved to WE following my parents to germany, i was 19 and i'd just finished high school. and i experienced and witnessed the extreme exploitation of eastern european immigrants in germany

like my parents, i was also forced to work illegally if i wanted to survive (by the german state and their bureaucracy), do jobs in conditions no local would ever work in, and for pay no german would ever deign to work for.

i listened to my mom's stories abt her boss physically abusing her at the end of 12 hour work shifts. i listened to her rationalise it away, swallowing it all bc we had to prove we had a right to exist there and wanting a better life would've made us seem ungrateful.

i myself was forced to witness and occasionally participate in less than legal business practices in ways that were out of my control

i was abused and assulted, emotionally and sexually by ppl i depended on for survival, specifically because they knew i had nowhere to go and nobody to turn to.

so no, i may not be an italian immigrant in 30s new york, but that doesn't mean i'm not using my 'own voice' to process my immigrant trauma in a piece of dramatic fiction that is safely removed from my literal reality but close enough to reflect my own pain in many ways.