i am just overwhelmed by the entire presentation. overwhelmed, sickened, disgusted, terrified, the entire gambit of emotions. i can't even listen to these damn pundits trying to tell me how to feel about all this.
i saw footage of the vp of united states evacuated from capitol because white people were trying to kill him. literally. no hyperbole.

and i remember the weeks of excuses and calls for moving on and unity.
i saw footage of a distressed cop getting his face gouged as he is being smashed by a crowd. what an intimate brutality.

and i remember weeks of excuses and calls for moving on and unity.
i saw footage of politicians being evacuated with a white supremacist on the ground being held at gun point by cops mere feet from them. i remember a black woman, mentally distressed, who was shot and killed in front of her child bcz she breached a barrier outside building.
i saw video that showed a cop being attacked and a woman being killed--and the only person they talked about was the cop. they literally didn't mention the woman being crushed to death feet away from the cop.
i see white supremacists running through hallways, breaking through doors, people walking one way and then turning around and running other way as white supremacists approach the area.

and i remember weeks of people making fun of AOC for being scared.
i see all this white criminality--white violence, white rage, white destruction, and i see politicians saying, this process is flawed and i can't convict him no matter how compelling footage is. or: trump is innocent. bcz 'system' is flawed.
i am thinking of the intimacy, the terrible grotesque intimacy of george floyd's murder. and how the people who protested that violence were told the system is not flawed. the system is perfect. people that protest the system are anarchists that need to be on watch list.
white criminality is not only never criminalized, it is *protected*. it is protected and enshrined to the point white criminality becomes white innocence.
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