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I think a handful of gents in the manosphere can attest that I’ve always been an advocate for LTR, which is largely influenced by my upbringing. However, i now have come to terms with the fact that times have changed.
It was easier for my dad in the 80s to find a virtuous woman. The non existence of social media, few degenerates, honour in chastity and shunning of unpleasant behaviour among other social conventions aided in keeping people in check and act in accordance with society’s standards
My adamance in being a firm believer of LTR stems from the environment i was brought up in. This has created some cognitive dissonances. Some RP principles clash with what I’ve personally witnessed I can’t stress enough the intrapersonal conflict this creates.
Fortunately, my willingness to unlearn, be teachable, to adapt and disregard my old ideologies has helped pave the way for a more holistic unbiased approach towards my relationships. Though i still, to some extent hold LTR to a high regard, I’m not hell bent on it as i was before
Many could argue that believing in LTR is one the symptoms of oneitis but there’s a difference and i personally know this as i have experienced both on their extreme sides. LTR is deciding to commit to one person and still be okay if things don’t work out, no silly idealisations.
My biggest challenge was to learn and integrate outcome independence with LTRs. Admittedly, it’s not easy to invest heavily in a rship and still be okay with losing that person, you cannot easily detach yourself from what your life has been accustomed to for years.
With the knowledge i have amassed from the community and experiences i have had, i can confidently say there’s some naivety in wanting LTR with every woman you get with. It’s also time consuming as your vetting skills need to be a cut above the rest.
The juice is defs not worth the squeeze but there are some great indicators that some women are LTR worthy and you could commence your vetting process, you have to be discerning to actually differentiate from the onset on whether or not who’s worthy of vetting.
My stance on LTRs hasn’t changed much but it’s my approach towards them that has changed. It’s okay to mess around but the women you mess around with still need to have some decent attributes. Harlots should never be your portion.
I’m done actively looking for a “good” woman to have a solid relationship with. If she comes along, great, if not, does the price of maize increase? Certainly not. All good. We move, we enjoy life, after all, we’re Rationale Males.
