So I’m admiring the #NotJustNCVO bravery, still anxious to share my own. Why? Because victims carry shame. But I’ve shared with my team and my support network and colleagues and I’m not ashamed (*shakes while typing...) 1/20

I don’t want to work for someone that sees my case and says “she’s trouble.” You’re right, if you condone bullying or discrimination, I am trouble. We change this by talking about it and being the best bosses we can in the future. 2/20

A few years ago, I sent a tweet about #MeToo that went viral. As I was contacted by journalists and talked anonymously about my experiences, my employer freaked out. They (managers and leadership) tried every trick in the book. 3/20

They gaslit, the shouted, they ostracised, they bullied. They told me speaking out would ruin my career. They told me I was bringing the organisation into disrepute. They cornered me in meeting rooms while I cried. 4/20

They tried to make me sign an NDA to make it all go away. I refused on the grounds that was what my original tweet was about. They stalled the internal dispute processes in the hope I would be ground down. 5/20

They had their barrister cross examine me like they were fighting for my character and reputation to be destroyed. It’s all public record, none of it added up. I was good at my job and they were wrong. 6/20

As a white, able-bodied, heterosexual, young woman, I hold privilege. At the time, I don’t think I was as aware how much easier it was for me because of these things. But re-reading my case, let’s not pretend it wasn’t easier for me, it was. 7/20

I part-won my employment tribunal but I can’t share the stories that came flooding into my DMs with people sharing the cases that were still causing so much pain. Still now, people will ask if I can talk. I do what I can to support/share what I learnt along the way. 8/20

The offer stands for you too - if you want to talk, DM me. 9/20

Here are the most common things I share with people. Others like @MsSMoreau have compiled top advice too https://twitter.com/mssmoreau/status/1359058512370884611?s=21 10/20

There’s no way I could have kept going without my union reps support and I certainly couldn’t have afforded a barrister at the tribunal. Join one, try to have your employer recognise them, but don’t worry if they don’t. Join one. 11/20

Perform a subject access request. Any email or message that’s about your performance is your data. Get hold of it. Examine it. Challenge it if you know something is missing. 12/20 https://ico.org.uk/your-data-matters/your-right-to-get-copies-of-your-data/

Don’t trust anything they advise you. Google it. They tell you they can’t hand over emails in a subject access request? Google it. They say they’re allowed to move a meeting? Google it. The system is rigged, they can &do lie. Trusted sources often took me to @CitizensAdvice 13/20

Many charities are afraid of press and press alone. Whistleblowing is protected by law. Talking out about discrimination, even if it didn’t happen to you, is protected. 14/20 https://protect-advice.org.uk 

Document everything. Meetings, interactions, emails, conversations. I mean everything, like you’re a solving a Netflix crime series. 15/20

I didn’t do this but I wish I had - notify the Board. If they perpetuate the bullying or discrimination, they too will be accountable to the Charity Commission later. If it’s a public body, consider your options of notifying the department who is responsible. 16/20

If you choose to sign an NDA, that’s ok. Sometimes the fight is not worth ruining your mental health/your life, that’s no one’s choice but yours. But your employer should provide money for you to have independent legal advice, otherwise you can take it to the courts later 17/20

Even after I won, did my employer take responsibility? Did they apologise and applaud my “people in the lead” approach? Did they bollocks. (No, of course they never appealed). Don’t expect to feel better even when you’ve won. 18/20

As @LenaBheeroo () reminded me when I flagged HR accountability, discrimination is everyone’s problem. If you stand by, you are a perpetrator but this one is for HR & press especially: if you choose to protect leadership above your duty of care, you too are accountable. 19/20

Finally, the hardest one - don’t let them burden you with their shame. You don’t respect these people so don’t give their words the weight they want them to. That’s a powerful defence. You are not a martyr. Find others who you can talk with, cry with, process with. 20/20 ENDS.