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Sex workers are NOT like therapists, a thread 
I often hear both clients and sex workers say that visiting a sex worker is like therapy. Clients may visit the same SW multiple times & build (what feels like) a deep trusting relationship.
I often hear both clients and sex workers say that visiting a sex worker is like therapy. Clients may visit the same SW multiple times & build (what feels like) a deep trusting relationship.
In light of this relationship, clients may feel as though the sessions they have are a safe space & begin to open up & become vulnerable. They may feel as though the sessions they have with a sex worker are the only place they can relax, be themselves & be honest.
& don't get me wrong, this is lovely & certainly therapeutic. But it's not therapy.
Visiting a sex worker is therapeutic in the same way that having a bath is therapeutic, or going for a walk, going to a gym class, laughing w friends, bonding w a partner, hanging out w a pet.
Visiting a sex worker is therapeutic in the same way that having a bath is therapeutic, or going for a walk, going to a gym class, laughing w friends, bonding w a partner, hanging out w a pet.
These are all necessary human experiences that nourish our souls & provide enjoyment but also healing, relaxation & the opportunity recharging.
A client-sex worker relationship can also be particularly healing to a client if they haven't had that experience of being attended to, cared for & accepted before. & in this way, it MAY be like therapy.
But therapy is not simply being attended to, cared for & accepted.
But therapy is not simply being attended to, cared for & accepted.
Therapy that results in true characterological change (rather than only symptom reduction) is not easy. It is deeply difficult & painful work. It requires a skilful therapist who will really challenge you & who will be brutally honest with you.
The nature of the client-sex worker relationship means that the SW will never be truly, objectively honest w a client. The role of a sex worker is to make the client feel good – that makes the client keep coming back. This obfuscates the truth.
In contrast, if your therapist continues you to allow to feel comfortable, you might question whether true change will occur.
& while some sex workers may have deep & honest conversations with clients, the boundaries & motives of SWs are inherently different than that of a therapist. A SW cannot (& should not) provide unrelenting care in the way a committed therapist does.
All this is to say, that to compare SW & therapy is a false equivalence. We can acknowledge the positive therapeutic benefits that some clients experience from visiting SWs without undermining the expertise of therapists & the unique role that they play.
