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It's #TimeToTalkDay today.1/10
I touched on this a while back, but I wanted to share a bit more. I've thought long and hard about it, but I'm at a stage now where I think I can be open. Not doing this for sympathy, or anything like that. More for #MentalHealthAwareness.
2/10 This past year I've been in a very dark place. I identified it was gathering speed, and it soon took over. I'd look forward to bed as it was a break from my mind (if I could get to sleep that is). I'd wake up in the morning, but not want to. It was evil, it had consumed me.
3/10 About a year into it, it got really bad. I was breaking down all the time and I couldn't focus on anything. I'd taken time off work, but even that wasn't helping. I genuinely couldn't function and I was EXTREMELY scared. But I have a good life? I couldn't let that go.
4/10 I went to my GP, but nothing was helping. One day it got too much and I ended up being admitted to a psychiatric assessment unit. That will stay with me. The Crisis Team really helped me and I spent a week away in a crisis house. That was strange & again will stay with me.
5/10 ... I just felt so disconnected. I was gone, lost, the old Josh was a memory. My parents were very worried, my wife constantly checked in on me when I was alone. I didn't know what was happening. Felt like a terrible nightmare. But it was real.
6/1 I'd go on walks and try and escape, but it never stopped. I tried to battle through and tried to keep Twitter going, but it was extremely hard to do. My motivation had gone. But deep seeded down was my desire to create still. This is where ππππππππ£π₯π€
was born.
was born.
7/10 It was tough to do, but I did it. It called to me, it made me think again. It wasn't the sole reason for getting better, but it certainly helped. After New Year I noticed my mood stabilising. I went back to work (work were amazing). My zest for life had come back, but how?
8/10 I was so convinced I'd never get out of it. At times it felt like I genuinely couldn't go on. But something has changed. Was it one thing? A combination of things? (I'd started hypnotherapy too). What had happened? I'm not sure, but I'm glad of it, whatever it was.
9/10 I feel better, I'm not healed, but I feel like me again. I feel a huge weight has lifted (as crindge as that sounds). I now genuinely enjoy walking, posting and creating content and I hope that shines through in what I've got planned for the account soon.
10/10.. Yeah, it's been grim. Really bleak. But somehow I've gotten through the worst of it. And I wanted to let you know that was also part down to you too. You didn't know it, I didn't want to bring it up. But I can't ignore it. My inbox is open 24/7 to you.
Thanks,
Josh
Thanks,
Josh
