Thrd: Menstruation/Dysphoria

1/ Difficult periods are sometimes the first catalyst for young women becoming alienated from their bodies.

Some have given congratulatory speeches about the vague accomplishment of "becoming a woman."

2/ Others learned about periods through a mundane sex-ed lesson at school. Yet others knew very little about their periods except they are sometimes painful, can be embarrassing, and make activities they’d taken for granted,

3/ like swimming and outdoor play, all-of-a-sudden much more difficult.

When young women hate their periods, they might be told, in a matter-of-fact grumbling way, “well, nobody likes having a period, honey. It’s just a part of life.”

4/ On a personal note, till my early/mid 30s, I knew very little about the menstrual cycle. For me it had always been completely out of sight, out of mind. Once a month, I’d be reminded it exists and I’d have a kind of “oh crap!” moment.

5/ I’d complete the necessary hygiene and try to move on with my life. I was often plowing through various stages of this monthly cycle with little acknowledgement or understanding of how my entire mind, body, and mood was ebbing and flowing. Every month, for years on end.

6/ It’s absolutely incredible if we pay attention: like clockwork, women have spikes in my energy, sociability, libido, and productivity every month. Then at other times, we may become withdrawn, inwardly focused, or a bit melancholy.

7/ More than the medicalized version of PMS cramps and “mood changes,” the body is truly amazing and INSTRUCTIVE if we listen carefully.

I’m no expert here, and I’m still learning, but as I’ve become more attuned to these signals in myself (and in my clients), I’ve wondered:

8/ - Why aren't all therapists and psychiatrists taught to understand the way this process impacts a female client’s moods? Not in a condescending or stigmatizing way, but in a manner that respects the body?

9/ - Why is it not part of every girl’s education to learn about the menstrual cycle AND how to work with it?

- Why do we only hear about menstruation in relation to puberty, pregnancy, or menopause? Do women’s lives just turn off between these life events?

10/ - And for all the dysphoric girls who feel repulsed at the idea of becoming pregnant, don’t they also, have a lot of value to gain from working in HARMONY with their bodies?

11/ This is not about fertility or pregnancy. This is about building a relationship of respect and awe with the only body we ever get in life.

I wonder if dysphoric females could foster some curiosity about and cooperation with their bodies, could that lessen the distress?

12/ Rather than treating menstruation as something that must be stopped, can we professionals approach this incredible process with more reverence?

I wish I had been taught these things when I was a young girl, but I’m grateful to be learning now…

13/13 *I got a lovely menstrual journal for my birthday yesterday. Here it is if anyone is interested: https://kapu.community/