So, I have the luxury of a therapist with a background in child psych, and if your kiddo is 5-7 and just A HUGE ASSHOLE over the last few weeks, especially with rules and boundaries, here is what we talked about in my session today, hope it helps.

First, if you're wondering if you're a bad parent, then you're probably not a bad parent.

Our kiddo is just pushing all sorts of boundaries and acting out in all ways and holy fuck, what a Voltron of Not Listening.

But my therapist said at this stage, this is part of child development. We just see it WAY MORE because of the pandemic.

She said from 3-5, kids just assume parents make the rules in a black/white manner. So they test the fence but know what the rules are.

But from 6-10, they start to understand context and cause/effect. With that comes a questioning of what the boundaries really are.

So they'll say "this is the boundary, but does it still apply in X circumstance? Or if we do Y first?" Their little brains are developing critical thinking. And you'd rather them constantly trying to problem-solve/find a way than not. It's just really fucking annoying right now.

So WHY DOES THIS SUCK SO MUCH. Well, we are acting as parent, teacher, and peer all in one. So normally, they'd do all this boundary testing with a community.

But it's just the parents right now, so they 1) test harder 2) we see ALL OF IT.

So, this is totally normal. Remember, if they were at school, that's 4-6 hours where you would NOT see it. and it wouldn't be concentrated just on you.

Also, kids 5-7 should bounce back the easiest from this mess. A good indicator is this: if you lose your shit with them and repair it, then they go right on to something else, that's a good sign.

It means they're able to separate good/bad context and move on pretty readily.

Her advice? Be consistent, hold your boundaries, and it's OK to lose your shit with them poking at every god damn boundary. Just repair it ASAP, that repair will model a lifetime of healthy interaction for them.

Anyways, this is what I was dealing with this morning and I've already repeated it several times, so hope it helps. Fucking kids, amiright?