In addition to systemic homophobia/transphobia, the ongoing characterization of Christian marriage being innately unfulfilling is also why some lesbians end up marrying men and gay dudes end up marrying women. We’re taught that difficulty is “industry standard.”

Instead of viewing lack of compatibility or “something missing” as proof the relationship shouldn’t continue, evangelicalism made us view these things as “par the course” that need to be withstood & prayed through because even straight Christians joked about hating their spouses.

Even further, compatibility was mostly measured based on whether that person “was a saved believer.” Compatibility was judged less on whether you communicated well together, cared about each other’s needs, supported each other goals, or even enjoyed each other’s damn company.

Sexual compatibility (for people who find sex important in relationships, ‘cause not everyone does) was also Not A Thing. If you hate sex with your spouse, you’re expected to suck it up “for God” because “your body is not your own” instead of ask yourself WHY it’s unfulfilling.