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Things I Wish I Knew When I Began Transitioning: A Thread
So there are a ton of things that the average trans person may not know when beginning transitioning. I thought I'd share a few of the things I wish I knew before I started. These are based on my own experiences. 1/?
So there are a ton of things that the average trans person may not know when beginning transitioning. I thought I'd share a few of the things I wish I knew before I started. These are based on my own experiences. 1/?
1) Social transitioning and medical transitioning aren't the same thing. They often occur together, but don't always. Not doing one, the other, or both does not invalidate someone's identity as a trans person.
2) Transition is not a linear experience. There's a lot of starting, stopping, and starting again.
3) Medical transition comes with many, many hurdles. Even if you're lucky enough to go to an informed consent clinic for Hormone Replacement Therapy, most jurisdictions still require letters from Doctors and Time Lived As Preferred Gender before they'll allow surgeries.
3 Cont) Notice that this leaves out nonbinary people and surgeries they might need.
4) With HRT, it isn't uncommon to have gap periods where you are not actively on HRT. This can happen due to a loss of insurance, medical conditions, and more. While for many such periods aren't infrequent, they are by no means rare.
5) Nonbinary people are valid and their existence does not invalidate binary trans folx. When you're a binary egg, unfortunately a lot of the information you have access to comes from bigoted sources who attempt to erase and invalidate nonbinary people.
6) Girlmode and Boymode are both things that binary transitioning people (as well as genderfluid people) experience. Early in transition, it's very common to begin exploring your true gender expression slowly, only presenting as your true self periodically as you test the waters.
7) As a binary trans person, moving past your Girlmode/Boymode to live full time as yourself is very freeing, but it's also terrifying, particularly if you struggle with "passing." The harassment you will face is real and often worse than you expect.
8) The loss of cis-presenting privilege is sobering. You go from being part of the most widely accepted group (at least in appearance) to being part of the least accepted and most hated group.
8 Cont) This can lead you to go down one of a couple of paths; you tend to either develop a sense of solidarity with other oppressed people, or you tend to get bitter and angry. Often times, both of these things.
9) There are way, way more trans people than you think. When you're an egg or beginning transition, it can feel like you're the only one doing so. But this isn't true. While the trans community is often scattered, it's much bigger than people think.
10) Trans people are not monolithic. There exist the same factionalism and gatekeeping that occur in any communities. You will run in to trans people with bad takes. You will run in to trans people who tell you that you're being trans wrong.
11) Transmedicalists, people that think you must medically transition to be valid in your trans identity, exist and they're among the worst gatekeepers in the trans community. Steer clear of groups that swing that direction if you want to be a kind and accepting person.
12) Transition can ease gender dysphoria, but it often doesn't eliminate it. Even if you have periods of gender euphoria, gender dysphoria can hit sometimes. It's not fun when it does, but you will get through it.
13) Transitioning is winning at life. This doesn't mean that everyone should transition. It means that if you're willing to go through such hardship in the name of being yourself, you're mightier than you realize.
