I almost got kicked out of graduate school for being a sex worker and now that I’ve graduated I can finally share.
Story time thread.

(CW discrimination and psychological manipulation within the educational system)

many of yall know I’ve been involved in SW activism and dedicated to bringing education around our community into academic and health care spaces. This really sparked during my undergraduate program when I came out to my cohort and inevitably undergrad faculty as well

It was then that I began to realize how much talking things out in a space like the one I was in could have a ripple effect! and while yes, its exhausting to be the person doing that labor - I believe I should do it if I have the privilege of being in such a space.

This group was supportive and some of the faculty changed my life for the better. I moved on to become a researcher&publish works centering SW as well as offering competency trainings in the health care field. Eventually, I went into graduate school&wanted to do the same

In this case my cohort was as open and welcoming as my undergrad had been, but the faculty were not. Despite this program touting itself as one of the most inclusive in the country. I began to be strategically separated from peers at times to be questioned and asked things like

“what do you actually do with clients” and told I might not be a good fit for the program due to ‘ethical/moral dilemmas’ my work might cause.
I constantly had to be on guard and ready to answer questions strategically so as to not have anything else weaponized against me

I was tossed back and forth by faculty between being told I could stay and being told I couldnt move forward for an entire semester (v good cop/bad cop). When I reached out to my cohort for support the faculty attempted to silence me saying I was not behaving professionally by

asking for help! the faculty in this program are notorious for strategically gaslighting their most marginalized students, previous cohorts had discretely warned us during orientations. Mind you this is a program that claimed to support the concept of community over individualism

I was told because of this work I may not have the capacity to be professional in the way the field would require. I constantly had to have whorephobic+harmful conversations with a handful of people who were in a position of power and literally held my fate in their hands.

And of course I had to be as calm, professional, and seemingly kind as I navigated all this or i surely would have been kicked out at the first sign of cracking. I didnt give them the pleasure of seeing me break. During that semester my hair started falling out, my weight shot up

and my mental health was an absolute wreck to the point where I was almost hospitalized. But I wouldnt go down without a fight, this was my dream and I deserved to be there just like everyone else. I constantly told myself ‘Mi mama didnt immigrate here for me to give up now!’

My cohort began to speak up against faculty. Telling them how discriminatory they were being and that none of us would be quiet. They began to say they would talk to media or hold a protest in front of the school if they didnt drop it (and the last thing this school needed was

another scandal). I hired an attorney and prepped for the worst. After a few months of this the faculty and I came to an agreement. And it isnt one I’m proud of. Essentially, keep my head down and talk less about SW, I still could write about it as I had an academic history of

that to begin with, and I would be allowed to stay. Though it was clear I was on thin ice the remaining years I was in the program. I was held to a higher standard. But even there something happened. A couple of the faculty changed over

the course of my time there and began to integrate and become more inclusive of the SW community. One faculty who I had particularly admired for their work and intellect called me into a meeting and apologized to me personally for the way things were handled.

honestly dont know if I forgive any of the faculty, I’m not sure I’m that big of a person. Now that I’ve graduated and I’m out I plan on telling my story in more detail. I question if I should talk to faculty and suggest they have a committee for these types of situations so

they do not continue perpetuating so much harm. I question if I should just let it be and never look back, consider myself “lucky” I made it. I question where the line between protecting myself and protecting community ends and begins.

All this is to say the work marginalized people do to educate others is exhausting. The work we do to protect each other is incredibly draining. And honestly its scary. Its heavy. It is a burden.
It shouldn’t be this way.

Sex workers are people, stop treating us otherwise