Read on Twitter
THREAD: things from the pandemic i think we should keep forever
1. m&s prebagging the fresh croissants
1. m&s prebagging the fresh croissants
2. queuing at bars instead of scrumming
you know like we have been doing literally everywhere else for hundreds of years
you know like we have been doing literally everywhere else for hundreds of years
3. that feeling of relief when no one sits next to me on the tube, but also not taking it personally when no one sits next to me on the tube
4. first dates in the park because they are cheaper than trad bar meetups and it’s easier to just leg it if things go south
5. free hand sanitiser everywhere
6. forcing the elderly to learn how to video conference
7. no fringe
not having to pretend i enjoy the fringe or like hearing about the fringe
not having to pretend i enjoy the fringe or like hearing about the fringe
8. being able to blame masks for not recognising people you should definitely recognise when you bump into them
9. getting to snoop inside people's homes via zoom
10. mouthing out theoretical arguments in your head that you always win can be now done in the shops behind a mask instead of the shower
11. fewer traumatic bad breath experiences from others
12. no-contact introductions means fewer harrowing handshake-hug-cheekpeck misjudgments
12b. huge reduction in the costs of associated therapy
12b. huge reduction in the costs of associated therapy
13. waiting for the food delivery guy to leave before you collect your pile of mcdonalds is now an act of covid-secure heroism instead of an inability to face your shame
14. getting less hung up on peoples’ teeth during conversations
15. getting to occasionally pretend that you’re the hero of an apocalyptic sci fi film
16. more table service (am lazy)
17. not getting recognised in the street by exes/that one obsessive NSTAAF superfan who’s always in the co-op
18. sliding your mask up over your whole face to signal that you're done with a conversation
19. daily government televised slideshow addresses but instead of coronavirus data it’s a roundup of the days internet memes
and it ends with the faces of everyone twitter cancelled that day projected onto parliament with music and cannon shots like in the hunger games
and it ends with the faces of everyone twitter cancelled that day projected onto parliament with music and cannon shots like in the hunger games
20. everyone now having to believe your obvious plan-cancelling lie that a notoriously unpredictable and seemingly arbitrary government app has ordered you to stay home
