Currently at the shelter right now. Gonna share reflections (of this year/ in general) if you don’t mind...

When people hear of needle exchange programs, people sometimes feel uneasy about it because the assumption is that it’s supporting their drug use. Actually, that’s far from the truth.

When people utilize these programs, it means that they have access to sterile needles and don’t need to share or reuse needles. This can significantly reduce the spread of infections.

It’s actually one of the ways programs can stay connected with mobile folks who use and build relationships with them. It gives people the opportunity to offer resources should there come a time when they feel ready to take the next step. And if not, that’s ok too.

Also, friends who use together are often the first responders to a drug overdose, not EMTs. That’s why providing narcan (used to temporarily reverse overdoses) is such an important of harm reduction.

It was probably the end of January early February, I learned how bad this pandemic was going to be after asking the nurses that visit the shelter how serious this was. They said MDH was freaking out. One of the nurses retired shortly after.

The beginning of the lockdown was extremely hard on shelter guests. It still is. But the abrupt changes in programs was felt. Bars were closed, detox programs had limited their capacity. It felt like there was a spike in substance and drug use.

We’ve lost a number of people, that we haven’t really had a formal goodbye or memorial for(separate from the annual homeless memorial) because of COVID. It hurts, not gonna lie.

On two occasions during a drug overdose outside, I’ve seen people in their cars recording. Literally had to scream ( it’s an already chaotic situation) at people who think it’s ok to record folks 1. When they’re not sober enough to consent and 2. When they’re overdosing.

So yeah, there’s a couple people who have videos of me screaming. One person driving by even yelled “let her die, as me and my coworkers were trying reverse an overdose outside. Honestly, he said what a lot of people feel about people who struggle with drug use.

It’s such a dark thing to shout at someone who is litterrrallly dying. It’s dark in general.

We were able to reverse the overdose but geez. When someone overdoses, I can’t even begin to describe the level of adrenaline you feel, the moment it hits that this person’s life is now in your hands.I shake for an hour and it takes about 48 hours for me to fully recover from it.

And honestly, I feel lowkey pissed after we reverse it, simply because the thought of losing them hurts. You build deep relationships with folks. It’s hard enough as it is when you hear about someone overdosing but the deeper the relationship the more painful it becomes.

But I can’t stay upset for long because at the end of the day, the other scenario would be they were alone and overdosed. It would’ve been fatal. I don’t know who said it or where I read it but the statement, “the opposite of addiction is community,” is so so true.

We get a wide range of responses from people who are finally housed. People are generally happy about it, but something that’s overlooked is the transition from being around so many people (whether it’s outside or staying at a shelter) to being alone in your own apartment.

Sometimes people call us just talk to us because that transition into housing can be really lonely. That’s why I really loved that people could come back to eat dinner with us, because it helps people feel connected and remain in community. But COVID..

I don’t do any casework at the shelter, it’s mostly checking in with people to see how they’re doing emotionally and housekeeping. My superpower/strength is de escalation and negotiation. It’s one of the skills I’m really proud of having.

A year after I started working at the shelter, I began taking portraits of people and printing them out. I’d place a copy of them on a bulletin at the staff desk in a separate area from the main office so people could grab copies. But people kept asking if the people died...

We have three different desks in the shelter all in different parts of the building. In our staff/main office , we have a wall of pictures of former guests who have passed away. Many people at the shelter associate pictures of people with death.

Been trying to figure out ways to change that association. It makes me sad....

The portraits I took, some of them were used to make profiles of people on HMIS. HMIS is basically system for all shelters to have access to bed reservations, history of shelter stays, restrictions from shelters etc.

When someone new is looking to make a bed reservation, they go downtown to St. Olaf’s and a community card is made for them. But the pictures they use on the card and in the system can look very institutional, not flattering, not colorful.

So, my manager asking me to take photos of new guests for their profiles on HMIS was cool because it felt like a was a small way I could impact an employee’s perception of the person when they see their profile in the system. I took them with my phone.

If you look at some of the profile photos in the system, people are really just not at their best, don’t always appear sober. And that’s the photo that ends up being in the system.

One of things I reallllly struggled with was when my job got a grant from a very famous billionaire. Take a wild guess. He gave us a couple million. So many guests had questions about where the money would go.

It was also hard because there were/are so many people that work who stay at the shelter, who don’t need any more support than just getting a deposit and first month’s rent. Just staying in the shelter to save up for a place.

I wonder what wonders it would have done if a check was just written to secure their deposit and first month’s rent. It’s complicated but it’s not? The money ended up going towards expanding a program.