WHITE PEOPLE:
The literal definition of racism from Merriam Webster:

"the systemic oppression of a racial group to the social, economic, and political advantage of another"
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/racism

1. Systemic - aka it's not just random happenstance, it also exists IN LAWS, ~

~ in POLICIES, in the way the world is set up. Those systems contribute to the oppression of marginalized identities.
2. Social, economic, political advantage - white people are not oppressed, they are the benefactors of the system. Oftentimes unknowingly reaping said benefits.

SO: Racism is *systemic* oppression, not just ~random~ oppression and the system is set up to their benefits.

THEREFORE: while you, a white person, may experience acts of prejudice or hate, IT IS DEFINITIONALLY NOT POSSIBLE FOR PEOPLE TO BE RACIST TO THE OPPRESSOR, AKA YOU

Racism literally only goes one way, not both.

Also, systemic oppression looks like:
Feminists (Susan B Anthony for example) fighting for the right for *white* women to vote, not *all* women. Just as one historical example.

As the oppressor, you have never been held accountable before.
You've never had to think about this, you've never had to see it.

That's why it hurts so much, but that hurt is nothing in comparison to the harm done to POC.