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one day I want to write a book about all the crazy clients I came across in my old job. Like, I wonder how the lady who tried to dump a massive amount of shares in her family’s company so she could tank the stock price to get back at her brother is doing.
absolute massive order, kept calling back until she got a rep who would place it, and then five minutes later we got a call from g1x like “yo, you actually want us to work this?”
or the guy who didn’t understand OTC quotes and placed a market order on BITCF when it first came out for 100k shares and literally cried at me until I sighed and called cana to ask for a bust. Fairly sure they sent a company email about me that day.
or the ... less great client who had a complex order fail and waited until a week after the options expired to call us and demand we make him whole, and by him I mean the account he completely wiped out that was his wife’s IRA
actually I sort of wonder how the guy I talked to at length about how markets are real and he can’t just “play both sides”, that’s called spoofing and he’s not a market maker, only for him to accuse me of being the CIA and that I’d need a warrant to get him to talk (???)
I wonder if he’s okay. I also wonder how the guy who got so mad at me for explaining how an intermarket sweep works said he was going to write congress a letter about me is doing. He seemed like he had some bigger issues going on.
I’m pretty sure the guy who called me more than one morning and asked for the same numbers every time, only to call back in the afternoon just to say the girl he talked to this morning was an idiot and wrong is dead now though.
Sometimes clients were cool though. I had a blind guy who would call in and request I look at specific derivatives and charts and would just sit there and talk to me in his sweet little ole cajun accent about how oil was going to move. That guy rocked.
What didn’t rock was the guy who was trading 11,000+ times a year (fills not orders) didn’t like how our platform handled on occasion under his massively inappropriate use of it, and wrote a letter to our CEO naming me, the last rep he talked to, in that and his eventual lawsuit
One time I worked an overnight shift on Labor Day because that was like 2.5x pay, and got a call at 3:45am that was just a lonely old dude who wanted to talk about technical analysis... I thought oh cool this will keep me awake... he talked for three hours straight
there were people I just straight up wanted to be. Client used to call in and demand I throw his whole account (3, 4 mil?) in [redacted] stock, but explicitly w/ market orders. I’d sit there with it typed up and read back, he’d scream “now!!”, we’d watch the market move together.
One of my fave random interaction was a very high up (think CIO, CFO, COO, etc) of [redacted war-profiteering co.] who called in and talked to me about nothing. He slammed a door accidentally and goes “the smartest engineers in the world, can’t make a quiet door for shit!”
Also, if you’re curious, the answer is yes. We all knew the largest account we’d ever seen. Among my friends I held the high score, because I dealt w/ anything involving additional risk. Placed trades for universities, etc, saw a >1B acct, died of jealousy.
I might go try and dig into some of my old notes tomorrow. Telling stories about people I used to work with is fun, I only remember the good stuff and not the complete misery. Be nice to your brokers, guys. The beep when you call and we answered got physically painful for me.
