on the one hand, i've got a bunch of redpilled and blackpilled men who want to convince me that everything is worthless and hopeless, forever.

on the other hand, i could trust in democracy with the understanding that i will have to always work for it, if i want it to work.

i'm a white guy, and as a white guy, nihilism's fucking easy. i'm not the one getting pulled over. i'm not the one getting shot by the police. it's real fucking easy for me to fantasize about the collapse of western civilization in an abstract way that i somehow survive.

it's extremely easy to imagine a way in which i can imagine myself a bomb thrower with a corporate job who has extremist views that i can talk about on the internet while i go to work every day.

it's much harder to see a way in which i listen to people who don't look like me, and follow their lead, and follow their instructions, and that's because i'm a white guy who's always been full of shit, and that's exactly what men who look like me — including me — should do.

here's a thing; as i have gotten older, i have come to understand faith much better, because, as a result of my color, my gender, my presentation and my orientation, i've never needed to imagine a world in which i might treated equally. i've never lived anywhere else.