Morning Coffee thoughts. A humorous look at the mandate of masculinity. I prefer this term than toxic masculinity. I watched the first Anchorman over the weekend. Some stand out scenes for me that provide a tongue in cheek look at the pressures our boys face. 1/9

The box - watch this clip. 4 men playing up to roles. When Ron tries to step outside the box. He’s ridiculed and forced to back track. Note the homophobia used to put him back in the box. He then feels it unsafe & conforms. A daily pressure for boys

2/9

What is love? Men are grappling with many situations and crave an opportunity to have meaningful conversations with other men. A fav sketch from the film Paradox is that boys and men crave intimacy 3/9

Sex as a game. In a game there are winners & losers. This scene brings in the need for sexual conquest as part of the mandate of masculinity. Ron provides male solidarity that we see far too often. Joining in/not trying to stop his colleague. 4/9

violence is often the default tool for men. We see it in this clip. Proving our worth physically often the challenge for many boys/men. To back away is to bring about ridicule & loss of face. Ron gives one rule. The rule is often don’t try to stop me 5/9

I wonder how the men reading this thread would identify within the news team. Here we see them all in action. As a young man I lacked the confidence that Brick portrays. I tried to fit in but was unhappy with behaviours I saw. I see this in Ron 6/9

Let’s end with an example where the actions of one man makes the difference. Be warned we see some violence At start the fight is taking place. Violence the tool as I discussed. The male solidarity I discussed also present 7/9

We then see another man approach the scene. He intervenes in a way that shows he cares about the other men. He makes that connection that breaks the sequence of events. He shows moral courage, he shows respect and it’s a respectful masculinity that is needed. 8/9

This man doesnt conform to the mandate of masculinity. I’ve no doubt he’s been there, right inside that man box I discuss. What you promote you permit. Respectful masculinity is what we should aspire to. 9/9

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