In my church career, some of the most edifying experiences have been to serve on boards and commissions with people whom I otherwise would probably never get to know -- largely because we're on opposite sides of theological/political fault lines.

(cont)

This isn't because those boards or commissions got very much done -- boards and commissions almost never do.

Nor is it because I learned a lot about how someone else thinks and therefore changed my way of thinking -- no, I am very confident in my way of thinking.

(cont)

It's because comportment matters, and most of us have no idea how to hold our own when someone holds ideas different from ours. Often it's a sign that we're insecure in our own formation or knowledge, but we jump right to attack the person because it's all we've got.

(cont)

So engaging w/ people we don't agree with forces us to:
--learn enough to know what the hell we're talking about.
--to have a drink and a laugh - and especially to pray -- with someone we've been conditioned to believe is the enemy, and who poses a threat to our confidence.

Cont

We can do that without giving up on the idea that they're wrong -- Some of the people I love most in this world I would never trust to catechize my children.

But it is obvious that most of us have no idea how to be around people who disagree with us habitually.

And I suspect that most of us are pretty insecure in our positions, which is why being around people who disagree with us habitually is so unsettling.

Anyway, I was just thinking about that as I doomscrolled on this website instead of doing the work I should be doing.

If you don't love people who you sincerely believe are wrong, well, you're missing out, my friends.

Thank you for coming to my DadTalk™