Marriage is a business agreement.

A thread.

Sidenote: this is going to be long.

I’m writing this based off observations and (obviously) not personal experience.

Always open to the possibility of being wrong and to be corrected or discussed with.

Without further ado, let us begin.

Covering the details of marriage will be meticulous and ofcourse there are always exceptions to the rule. As such, we’ll go over this in broad strokes as to three things:

1.0: Why is marriage a business agreement?
2.0: How does this affect us?
3.0: Things to look out for.

1.0:

Marriage is an emotional partnership between two individuals who love each other and wish to live with one another.

simple.

Marriage is an agreement between two people that choose to live with one another based off prior agreements and negotiation.

accurate.

1.1:

Prior to any marriage there is the courtship period. Where two individuals get to know one another. Often referred to as “dating” or the “engagement period”

During which time you establish habits, routines, and develop a bond with one another (ideally).

1.2:

After that period; both individuals will (if logical people) establish conditions prior to marriage.

Conditions that are not subject to spontaneous change after marriage.

E.g. one of the members has a weekend ritual or downtime that is placed as a condition.

1.3:

Clarification;

Both parties place conditions, both parties respect these conditions prior to and during marriage = harmony.

Both parties place conditions, both parties begin to disregard these conditions during marriage = disharmony.

A contract is only strong if upheld.

2.0:

The common view of marriage is that it should be done out of love. While the contrary belief is that marriage should be out of convenience and logic.

However, both sides (in extremes) can potentially harm us. How?

2.1:

Marriage based only out of love is akin to doing business with a best friend. You are blind to their flaws or ignore them for the sake of frienship. (Bad business)

Thus, in marriage terms, you sacrifice your convenience and success as a unit for the sake of romantic value

2.2:

Marriage based on logic is akin to doing business with someone you hardly know, but know their product.

Thus, in marriage terms, you sacrifice any chance of emotional value for the success of a unit.

Both situations can be detrimental to your partner and yourself.

2.3:

Now, obviously balance is perfection right? Yup.

Is it possible? Rarely.

Marriage isn’t selecting a product to best fit you, but a person.

People are variable. However, changes are never extreme or completely polar.

You can’t find 50-50, but 60-40? Thats very possible.

3.0:

Business tip;

When dealing with negotiation weigh your strengths and weaknesses versus theirs.

Compatibility is about finding where your strengths bolster their weaknesses and their strengths bolster yours.

Marriage isn’t acquisition, it’s a merger.

3.1:

Logic.

Look at how your potential partner treats their family, friends, and self.

How do they handle stress?
How do they handle anger?
How do they handle sadness?
How do they handle money?
How do they manage time?

Not the only points, but definitely important ones.

3.2:

Emotion.

Look at how your potential partner expresses themselves.

How do they express empathy?
How emotionally intelligent are they?
How in control of their emotions are they?
How much of themselves do they share?

Again, not the only points, but important ones.

Conclusion:

Remember, you will rarely marry the PERFECT partner. If you do, you are truly fortunate.

However, majority? You will need to BOTH put in the work.

You may not marry the ideal human being, but you can definitely avoid marrying the absolutely wrong choice.

Thanks.