#AmmTeasers
Thought I'd do a little Saturday night thread on what really makes opening pages sparkle for me.

If you don't get chosen & need to give a hard look at your pages, see if any of these pertain to your work.

MANY subs I didn't choose didn't have these flaws,btw
1/14

#ammteasers
TENSION

Let's parse this: it doesn't have to be STRESS, but I want the POV to have something they're actively working toward/against

It heightens stakes

It can be small--personal stuff is better than end-of-the-world stakes when getting to know a character!
2/14

#ammteasers
I'm not a fan of MCs just sort of floating along & reacting to things they're confronted with. I want them to be active in their lives because it makes the situation something I can *emotionally invest in*

This is what keeps your reader up past their bedtime
3/14

#ammteasers
Carrying on with the theme:
ACTIVE verbs make fiction flow SO much better than passive. Cut your "to be" verbs inasmuch as possible

ie: He stroked

instead of:
he was stroking
he had stroked
he is stroking
(like my verb choice? get your mind out of the gutter!)4/14

#ammteasers

CUT THE FILTERS.

It distances your reader.

No more "heard, saw, FELT (ack), wondered" etc.

ex: A siren screamed over the radio

instead of:

she heard a siren coming from the radio

The 2nd feels like narration rather than being immersed in the MCs POV

5/14

#ammteasers

Doing a find and replace for your list of filter verbs will perform a 180 on your writing.

Your POV will be so much more accessible to your readers (and that's what you want!)

It takes a while and is tedious, but the result = better crafted sentences

6/14

#ammteasers

Vary your sentence structure. I read a lot of Noun Verb, noun verb, noun verb sentences. MIX IT UP.

My first editor said the goal is not to begin a sentence on the page w/the same word.

(It's hard, so at least try for each paragraph beginning w/a diff word)

7/17

#ammteasers

We speak and (presumably, at least I do) *think* in contractions so your prose probably ought to use them.

I hear you historical authors...but nope.

Stilted formal language VERY rarely (almost never) works for *any* character.

Pinky swear.

8/14

#ammteasers
Read your dialogue out loud.
I stopped reading a number of subs 'cause the dialogue was unbelievable. Perk up your ears & listen to speech patterns as a homework assignment.
(ex: People rarely name each other in speech, so it shouldn't be in every other line.) 9/14

#ammteasers
My poor addled ADHD brain got dizzy when I read subs with a zillion characters named in the first pages.

We don't care about your MC yet, so don't throw every acquaintance they have at us before we have time to bond.

We end up not caring about any of them.
10/14

#ammteasers This is important, so I'm adding more:
Only include characters when they have an impact on the scene. We don't care if someone drifts across your MC’s view unless THEY MATTER. Otherwise, it's fluff. It's like meeting 20 strangers at once and feeling unanchored.
11/14

#ammteasers Going along w/the last, unless your characters clothes impact the scene (and that CAN mean character building, when it does matter), I don't care what they are wearing. I def don't care what everyone around them is wearing. (Caveat: unless it has a purpose)
12/14

#ammteasers

Every line in your scene ought to be doing double duty of moving the story forward (#1) and/or building the tension.

This includes character & world building, but make it important, not just a complete rundown of their looks/clothes/pedigree/house

13/14

#ammteasers Wrapping up 'cause this is ridiculously long, but you know I'll be back with more, ha!

If there is something that you particularly want to chat about, let me know. I can't help that I'm a loud mouth (mom of 4 and a teacher, so it's inevitable that I explain)
14/14