I'm at a café and at the table behind me some guy is droning about how he doesn't like girls who are "overdone" and this immaculately-made-up girl immediately says "I'm not overdone," as if to reaffirm herself for his interest and to my credit I did not throw something

(I am not a thrower. But, you know, in psychological terms)

He continues, "I like minimal, simple style."

Then she says "I mean, yes my Insta is full of fancy outfits but I like simple style."

I want to just print out pamphlets and hand them to women.

1) He's negging you because you seem too good for him. Now you're agreeing to his made-up, manipulative standards FOR YOU.

2) He doesn't want you to get attention bc he's insecure and thinks you will leave him

3) You don't need someone to gas you up and make you grow or rise. You need someone who will love and support you as *you* keep rising and growing.

4) All of this is visible on the first date

5) Stop twisting yourself into whatever a man wants!

"I'm a very big Bro Code guy." AAAAAHGGHHHG.

Needless to say she is charming and gorgeous and he is spotty and bossy

He is talking about "friendzoning," I stg

He's discussing his relationship strategies. "If you want the girl to be jealous...not in a toxic way..."

I hate him

To her credit she says "why would you do that? Never do that!"

The reason guys like this succeed is that parents, teachers, friends, and partners train women to ignore their own needs, and to doubt their instincts and self-advocacy. Here's a good Instagram from a therapist on why "relationship anxiety" is a red flag

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CKHrCoEDCSC/?igshid=tfv6j9qf4ybw