A couple of weeks ago I was having a conversation with @mikeindustries about social networks. He's a pain in the ass because he'll text me late and get my mind going when it's my bedtime.

I told him I would think about things and get my thoughts together. Here they are.

When it comes to social networks it's very easy to think that you need to find a new angle where you have these cool new features. It's the natural thing to do, but when it comes to social networks you really need to nail down human psychology.

More importantly, you need to understand social hierarchy and why some people flock to things. At its core, it comes down to the most basic (and annoying) need that most people have and that is acceptance.

Most of us are dying for acceptance, but not from everyone.

It has to be the people that we want to connect with. This is where many starting social networks get things wrong. They don't help you get accepted by anyone because to do that you have to help people grow their audience.

Most social networks leave it all up to you.

TikTok actively tries to get you views/followers when you get started. They pimp your stuff out because they understand that when you're getting views/likes/comments you feel accepted and when you feel accepted you're more likely to participate.

This plays to your ego.

Which is very, very important. Using a social network has to make you feel good about something. Instagram made you feel like you were a good photographer because of its free filters. Twitter made it seem like you had interesting thoughts based on a limited word count.

Now whether you're a good photographer or philosopher or not is a different story. It's about making you feel special and important which means you get to feel accepted.

Notice this doesn't really come down to features. Sure features can help that stuff.

But this has to be baked into the idea from the beginning. How can you make every person feel like the most special person in the room?

From there it becomes a business play. How do you help your people make money? How do you help them grow?

If you can show them that you can help them grow an audience (acceptance by others) and help them make money (create their own business) then you have something special on your end. From there it makes sense to think about the usual social things to keep people engaged.

Every social business success stems from this need to be accepted. That's not everything, but it's always the root. I don't see how you build a successful social anything without placing that at the center.

When you think about these things it also becomes obvious the different ways you can effectively grow an audience/community. But let's save that talk for another time.

Oh and read The Elephant in the Brain: Hidden Motives in Everyday Life to better understand how almost all decisions are based around our egos.

Building a business is a LOT easier when you understand this concept.