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TW: Abuse and Church Trauma
People have asked me if I think they’re being abused. They proceed to share their story. I try not to look shocked as they describe the horrifically abusive conditions they experience.
People have asked me if I think they’re being abused. They proceed to share their story. I try not to look shocked as they describe the horrifically abusive conditions they experience.
We sometimes lack the tools to know if we’re being abused or not. We’ve been trained to accept our own mistreatment as normal, necessary, and even good for us.
It’s not normal. It’s not necessary, and it’s not good for us.
Ever!
It’s not normal. It’s not necessary, and it’s not good for us.
Ever!
So, if you’re not sure you’re being abused, ask yourself these four questions:
1: ASK YOUR MIND
"Am I confused about what’s happening?"
This is about being in control of your thoughts. Confusion can indicate a loss of power. It can mean that something is happening that you didn’t consent to.
"Am I confused about what’s happening?"
This is about being in control of your thoughts. Confusion can indicate a loss of power. It can mean that something is happening that you didn’t consent to.
2: ASK YOUR FEELINGS
"Do I have a weird feeling?"
This is about being in control of your emotions. Emotions can be overwhelming. Sad? Anxious? Panicked? Afraid? You’re having this feeling because it’s a response to something happening to you. Try to discern what’s causing it.
"Do I have a weird feeling?"
This is about being in control of your emotions. Emotions can be overwhelming. Sad? Anxious? Panicked? Afraid? You’re having this feeling because it’s a response to something happening to you. Try to discern what’s causing it.
3: ASK YOUR WILL
"Would I have asked for this?"
This is about being in charge of your personal agency. This is about empowerment. You alone are the master of your life. If this is something you wouldn’t ever ask for, then don’t do it or receive it.
"Would I have asked for this?"
This is about being in charge of your personal agency. This is about empowerment. You alone are the master of your life. If this is something you wouldn’t ever ask for, then don’t do it or receive it.
4: ASK YOUR BODY
"Why is my body reacting this way?"
Increased heart rate? Sweating? Chills? Shivering? Pain? Headache? Tears? Often your body knows before you do that something is wrong. Listen to it.
Then get your body out of there.
"Why is my body reacting this way?"
Increased heart rate? Sweating? Chills? Shivering? Pain? Headache? Tears? Often your body knows before you do that something is wrong. Listen to it.
Then get your body out of there.
Your thoughts, your feelings, your will, and your body are all your personal tools to protect yourself from abuse and to live a healthy, happy life.
Trust them and use them
Trust them and use them
