Read on Twitter
I saw the discourse around the tweet about how cis people don’t realize a big reason for med transition is appeasing them. And like a lot of mutuals, my transition was for me, and good for my mental health. I have no interest in appeasing the cis. They mostly impeded transition.
That said, I like and largely agree with the tweet. Yes, my transition was for me. And I'm not special or singular in that. Wasn't just thinking of others when I liked that tweet. I meant me. Fuck cis demands. But I still feel a lot of transition isn't separable from cis demands.
A lot of trans discourse talks about a valid goal being safety. And a good portion of that for me is navigating cis demands.
A goal of mine is being able to look at myself in the mirror, feel at home in my body. And some of that is me having to survive under cisnormativity.
A goal of mine is being able to look at myself in the mirror, feel at home in my body. And some of that is me having to survive under cisnormativity.
Does that mean I wouldn't medically transition if I didn't live under cisnormativity? I can't say for sure, but I feel strongly it doesn't. My need is deep. Not that it would be less valid if I didn't.
Does it mean I feel as one trans discourse camp does, that some medical transition is just giving in to internalized transphobia? Not even remotely. I hate that argument, honestly. Change all you want, for any of the reasons you have and no justification needed. Still valid.
But I live in a cis world, and it's impossible for me to look in the mirror without having to navigate what I look like in that cis world, and I see what the world believes women look like. And I need as much of that as I can manage.
That's not "appeasing the cis" directly. But it's still navigating their demands--and their beliefs are demands. The cis gaze is a demand.
So, even saying FU to cis appeasement, even transitioning for me, however indirectly I recognize the outsized role accomodating plays.
So, even saying FU to cis appeasement, even transitioning for me, however indirectly I recognize the outsized role accomodating plays.
And if you want to call me saving my own life by medically transitioning to look more cis passing "internalized transphobia", I'm just going to call you an asshole for that.
I'll combat my dysphoria how I need and you can choke on your judgements of that.
I'll combat my dysphoria how I need and you can choke on your judgements of that.
But I'm not unable to see how that's me navigating a cis world. And the blame for that is theirs.
Some people envision their rejecting some cis rule as them being heroic and others assenting to it is others self-hating.
Some people envision their rejecting some cis rule as them being heroic and others assenting to it is others self-hating.
But honestly, I think that's BS. The rules we break often we do so because assenting to them harms us. The rules we harmonize with often we do because breaking them harms us.
Plenty of loud, proud trans and nonbinary people fight some parts, and quietly just fit in with others. That's not me being strong and you weak, or vice versa. That's each of us navigating different needs, in a cis world that hates all such needs.
I thought the tweet was good actually. I didn't see it as a justification for cutting off our medical access, nor as a condemnation of us as collaborators. I read it as a middle finger to cisnormativity.
And the woman who tweeted it is young. She has some insightful tweets. My takes stank much more at her age and at the stage of transition she's at.
Even if the tweet were bad, she only came out within the last year. She's baby trans. She's been catapulted quickly into having a big following--45k!
Look, I've pushed back on toxic messaging in the community myself. Plenty. Just, please consider how quickly the Trans Woman Bad Take Targeting System gets turned on baby trans. Responses were civil, but hundreds of messages of pushback can be a lot to cope with, even if civil.
