How long until this the average Mar-a-Lago guest I wonder?

Once toxic trump starts waking up to empty halls and a lonely 40ft buffet every morning he'll have to pay the mortgage somehow.

Let's take a journey into the future shall we?

I present to you, MAGA-Lago:
1/

Of course the neighborhood will have a bit more traffic, the faithful will have a yearly hajj to bask in the warm glow of their #OrangeGodEmperor.

"Did you see all my fans in the boats? Nobody's ever seen anything like it before," he'd say to his frustrated neighbors.
2/

Holidays are a bit different, far more interactive, but the Bud Light flows freely from gold plated statues and there's no shortage of objects to burn.

Cries of "Watch this!!" abound, often the last words of the speaker.
3/

The golf course has been repurposed to allow for more specialized "carts." The annual Mud Pit Jamboree features free towing, plenty of rapidly descending pistol rounds, eighteen haired bare chests and more wet tee shirts then you can shake a stick at.

Yee-haw.
4/

Earl has taken over the buffet, what are those thin pancakes anyway? It's like eating paper.

Nothing but shot from a tree Florida boar here, grilled, boiled, smoked and roasted. Hell, on a stick if you want it.

Well and grits. Earl's boar grits are the finest in Florida.
5/

"Weddings used to cost more than most of us MAGA could afford, but since MAGA-Lago's Outdoor Wedding plan was combined with our car crushing Monster Truck package folks are getting married WITHOUT the shotgun!!" - 3AM ad, Florida panhandle market.
6/

With the discontinuation of black tie events the MAGA faithful are free to dance and drink all night long in their natural garb, but you'd better know Achy Breaky Heart. And a way to fast dance to Proud to Be an American.

Or Born in the USA unironically.
7/

Of course Sunday's for that other guy.

The lack of attention keeps the #OrangeGodEmperor ensconced in his private dwellings for the day, pouting and "tweeting" on an iPhone with an app that runs bot complimentary comments 24/7 on "Twitter."
8/

"So come on down to MAGA-Lago!! It's a REAL American's delight! All your fantasies ARE true!"

Or you could do the smart thing: turn around and find a beach.

<fin>
(None of these pics are mine, this post is satire)

Y'all I'm a disabled guy, going through the brutal process of getting disability benefits.

In the meantime I've no income. If any of you have a few spare bucks it'd sure help keep the heat on. Even an RT is helpful.

Thanks so much everbody. http://gofund.me/750f4262