Monogamy-by-default sounds like college-by-default. I'm like hey, isn't it weird you enter this life plan that is meant to help but also you're now in a lot of debt... Aren't there actual serious downsides we're sort of pretending are normal? I get that college is helpful, but...

College has a big sting in it that ruins lives in a wide variety of ways, and we tend to brush it aside. When I say ppl aren't satisfied with sexual exclusivity in monogamy, it's like saying people are unsatisfied with college debt, even if they definitely wanted college.

Cause obviously long term monogamy isn't exactly naturally aligned with the needs of a lot of people in it. By the time men are old, 25% report actually cheating on their wives. Something in our institution of marriage is deeply broken, it's not serving a huge chunk of people.