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I think this armie hammer thing is perhaps a good illustration of how a broader acceptance of non-normative sexuality/sexual practices (good) can often be presented as a smokescreen for the physical pleasure men derive from abusing their social and political dominance over women.
like I think we can look at this and recognize that a notable tension exists between the inherent value of deregulating sexuality, and the very literal role of violence against women in determining what many men understand to be sexual, physical pleasure
a man who fantasizing about crushing a woman’s ribs and fucking her beaten body is a man who is a danger to women. and I say this not out of prudishness, but because it is a trend that is well founded and widely observed.
this is not to suggest that there’s no moral place for “rough sex,” which would imo be absurd (for too many reasons to even attempt to recount here), but rather, to note how the very invocation of “rough sex” may obscure the integration of gendered violence in sexuality itself.
anyway. here’s Catharine MacKinnon: https://readcatharinemackinnon.wordpress.com/
the obvious followup is “what do we do with those men?” I think it’s clear that a carceral response in inappropriate, for so many reasons, including that prisons are functionally laboratories of gendered violence. this is just one post on the subject. https://winnipegpolicecauseharm.org/blog/through-the-kaleidoscope/
but aside from critique of the system, and building strength/healing for survivors, which are necessary, I think the question of “what do we do about men?” (or, rly, about violent male desire) is a good one, and an open one. what does it mean to find pleasure outside of violence?
I don’t have an answer!! I’m sorry! This is not an area where I’ve done a lot of work, and it’s not an area where I frankly feel qualified to offer solutions. But I know this work is being done, and that the solutions are significant and long term. If you have links, add them?
my friend Jades ( @jswadron) once commented to me that an unfortunately essential aspect of the feminist project is teaching men how to live and love. I hate that I think she’s right.
but I also think we’d be much better positioned to do that under communism.
but I also think we’d be much better positioned to do that under communism.
