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How the #PremierLeague began: a photographic thread....
The PL has grown into the most lucrative league in world football, with world class players gracing its ranks. But it all began back in ‘92, with this photo, used by Sky to captivate viewers into purchasing subscriptions, by assembling TOP STARS from each of the 20 clubs.
Like tributes from the Hunger Games, each team sent the cream of the crop. Or did they?
The first thing to say is that the whole picture is iridescent with nostalgia. I mean, they’re all so shiny. It looks like all the cat’s eyes on the M6 met up for a reunion.
The first thing to say is that the whole picture is iridescent with nostalgia. I mean, they’re all so shiny. It looks like all the cat’s eyes on the M6 met up for a reunion.
It starts well enough: Lee Sharpe was a quality player with a rakish charm. Hobbies probably included shouting ‘oi oi’ while being nude in public. But United sent their Adonis, and rightly so.
Palace too sent John Salako: flair winger, handsome gent and articulate spokesman. Even Southampton sent Tim Flowers, one of England’s best young keepers and something of a housewives favourite, I’m sure.
But then it gets weird...
But then it gets weird...
David Hillier. Arsenal had peak Ian Wright. They had Kevin Campbell, Merson, Dixon. Who did they send as their champion? The guy who was best known for allegedly stealing luggage from an airport. Hillier was the Steve Morrow of Arsenal - and Arsenal already had Steve Morrow.
Sheffield Wednesday do send their star man, David Hirst, but it’s clear he’s come straight from a night out, refuses to take out his earring and is disappointed there wasn’t a free bar.
Tony Daley was an exciting talent on his day, but what the heck is he wearing?! Could Aston Villa not get the rights to their own kit? Introducing Toady Ladey of West Midlands Village.
Tim Sherwood was a good player. He wasn’t available on the day, but luckily a shapeshifting demon was able to fill in for him.
Next, how on earth is this guy a Premiership footballer?! He’s at best an unused sub for a pub side. You may say he’s Alan Kernaghan of Middlesbrough, but he’s not - he’s the guy who got hilarious diarrhoea on that lad’s holiday to Magaluf.
Andy Ritchie was 67 years old here, and had friends who had died in both world wars.
Remember this is the TOP LEAGUE IN EUROPEAN FOOTBALL.
Remember this is the TOP LEAGUE IN EUROPEAN FOOTBALL.
‘Wanna come and see the epic castle I built on Minecraft’, Garry Charles wants to know. ‘Mum’s cooking Alpha-bites’.
No thanks, Garry.
No thanks, Garry.
Obvious Shepherd’s Pie enthusiast Andy Sinton has run the same poetry night for 6 years.
THESE ARE THE BEST OF THE BEST!!!
THESE ARE THE BEST OF THE BEST!!!
Imagine if someone turned up at City’s training ground today looking like this.
‘No thanks mate, we don’t need any cars washing.’
‘I’m Ian Brightwell, I play for Manchester City.’
‘I don’t think so, fella.’
‘No thanks mate, we don’t need any cars washing.’
‘I’m Ian Brightwell, I play for Manchester City.’
‘I don’t think so, fella.’
David Silva knows they’ll be lucky to scrape a draw today.
Gordon Strachan needs to get to the tip before it closes but has just had to sit through 17 whole minutes of his 5-year old son’s woefully under-rehearsed magic show.
Two questions for you, Gordon Durie: why do you have a primitive woodland dwelling as a hairstyle, and didn’t you teach my sister high school netball?
SAS operative John Wark had just returned from infiltrating IRA cells in Northern Ireland, and hadn’t had chance to prepare.
The only man alive older than Andy Ritchie.
The only man alive older than Andy Ritchie.
Ian Culverhouse looks pretty normal actually. And nice that Norwich let a horse with DNA abnormalities design their kit that year. Always doing a lot in the community, the Canaries.
Now THIS! I don’t know anyone who knows more about 90s football than me, but I had zero idea who this even is, assuming that the Warwickshire county chess champion had stumbled into the wrong photo wearing pyjamas he got during a tour of the Far East. Turns out it’s Andy Pearce.
Carl Bradshaw is the opening act at every single open-mic comedy night I’ve ever been too. ‘Who’s on Tinder?’ he invariably starts with.
Turned up late for the shoot cos he was waiting for his uncle to pick him up.
Turned up late for the shoot cos he was waiting for his uncle to pick him up.
Everton sent Peter Beardsley as a joke. Surely. Surely?!
Apart from looking like someone’s Dad at an awards bash, Mark Wright just seems a bit too clean cut - like something has to give eventually. You can imagine him being featured on a news stories which ends with the phrase ‘before turning the gun on himself.’
Psychotic celebrity Vinnie Jones looks the most normal person there. And that should have told them something.
That’s your lot. Fair play to them all: they reached the top of the most coveted profession in Britain and got paid for being there. Respect.
That’s your lot. Fair play to them all: they reached the top of the most coveted profession in Britain and got paid for being there. Respect.
