Here’s a middle aged husband and father tip thread: we get in “the tunnel” of kid-rearing d work, and things get robotic. You just put one foot in front of the other. Happiness declines. You just do. But here’s what you need to do: show your wife and kids your personality.
You don’t need extraneous experiences or extra crap for your “mid-life crisis”—damn that boomer phrase! You need to get out of dude robotic reaction to all the stuff you gotta do and have fun, yes. *But with your wife and kids.* Reach back into the mischievous bastard pirate.
Drink at home on Friday night & teach yer kids poker or something you used to nerd out on. Use your strength and author-it-tie to surprise them and your wife with your likes and stop being a dad-simp. Bring them all into what you like. Romance the woman w/your old school charm.
All this crap about toxic this & that and false modern roles is holding you back. Boldly have fun with kids and wife, separately and together. You are a potential king if you step into the role. That’s the fulfillment of the family life you’ve chosen & you’re lucky to possess it.
It’s not hard. It’s right there for the taking. But our culture is cutting you off from it with all manner of nonsense. Go rogue in the home from time to time and bring the fam in on it. Share what you like with them.
Don’t be a coward either. The fam rolls their eyes at dad humor and hobbies at first. Used to be this was known. But you gotta man up and keep pushing until you break through to other side. And the point of being husband and dad is that it’s easy to do. I see so many held back.
“Oh, but my wife or my kids are different & they don’t like what I like & they don’t understand & you don’t know my situation...” This is is childish talk. Have fun & let yer flag fly. It’s not hard. Wife & kids in their own way want you to step up. Just do it & stop being weak.”
I could give “stop being married emo simp or hardened faux-doomer” dad/husband talks & become next Jordan Peterson (no relation) easy enough, but this thread’ll have to do. Just realize sometimes you can & should go w/instinct & stop playing this imposed role corrupt culture.