I was gonna make a tiktok to narrate this but I figured I'd put it here too:

RATING PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES BASED OFF MY TWITTER OBSERVATIONS OF THEIR USERBASE:

python: attracts mansplainers who cannot tell when a woman is making a joke and who have taken 1 code academy course. Go back to software carpentry, Jerry.

2/10

Ruby: Everyone who tweets about this language is a male-presenting mid-30s work from home dev with 4 days of unshaved stubble who loves Doom. I don't make the rules.

6.5/10

C/C++: Attracts senior devs who have been around since The Beginning who impart deep wisdom but also get the joke thank god. Being able to use malloc deters the mansplainers somehow? Wholesome AF

1000/10

IDL: Astronomers who get really ragingly defensive about it being not open source? Calm down, Geoffrey, I didn't want to replicate your results anyway.

4/10

CSS/HTML: here on a technicality but frontend devs who have no time for twitter because they're too busy googling how to center <div>s. Had a dope MySpace back in the day

0/10

C#: microsoft devs who use VSCode dark theme who are either out or currently closeted M*sk fanboys.

2/10

FORTRAN: Older white male astronomers who look like OWGs but are actually progressive and chill AF.

8/10

Haskell: Google cultists.

3.5/10

Javascript: People who listen to Nickelback but only ironically. Most of hard-drive space is node modules.

9/10

Java: First year compsci majors who think that iced coffee is a food group.

5.5/10 please go and sleep and leave the one woman in your cohort alone for the love of god.

CUDA: People who actually prefer hardware who got forced into programming against their will who were baptised into the Church of the GPU by an accidental Cray coolant leak.

9.5/10 my people

MATLAB: depressed engineering students who want to go into aerospace and will probably end up project managing at a mining company.

8/10 you deserve better

Julia: Impossible hipster physicists who are either into rock climbing, boutique coffee or wearing skinny jeans that are 2 sizes too small or some combo of all the above.

7.5/10

LabVIEW: People who don't like it when people put their lunch in the lab fridge.

10/10 because I live with one.

Maple: Applied mathematicians who wear hiking pants to work and crochet for fun. Socks n' stocks optional on this one but you get a free set with every license.

9.5/10

Look I've missed some if I missed your fav tag me and I'll add it.