i don’t like when neurotypicals tell me “don’t let your trauma define your life” because it’s really dismissive. trauma changes how your brain functions. when you have repeated trauma, your brain continues to function as if it’s still responding to trauma.
tw // csa , sa , abuse
My fight, flight or freeze response is just constantly “on.” I can’t trust anybody. I live in fear of racking up another traumatic experience bc ppl like me (CSA, SA, abuse survivors) are more likely to experience trauma again.
My fight, flight or freeze response is just constantly “on.” I can’t trust anybody. I live in fear of racking up another traumatic experience bc ppl like me (CSA, SA, abuse survivors) are more likely to experience trauma again.
I have frequent panic attacks that make it nearly impossible for me to leave the house because I have so many triggers, I dissociate more often than not. But yeah I shouldn’t let my trauma dictate my life.
And therapy for repeated trauma and C-PTSD is not easy to come by. I have state insurance. Medicaid. They don’t cover specialists. My therapist is an intern and that’s why I get to go to them for free. But they don’t have the skills necessary to help me work through all this shit
My therapist is literally one year older than me and has lots of experience being Black and non-binary and that’s fucking awesome because at least I have someone to vent to about those aspects and I don’t get invalidated, but they don’t have the tools to help me with everything.
I do the work that I can to heal, but it’s extremely difficult to heal on your own with like 20 years of trauma under your belt. Some things don’t just go away on their own. Go read a book and develop some sympathy please.
just in case anyone wanted to help out https://twitter.com/itsdamonnow/status/1345044621836099584