Thread by @TheFauph, Okay, this is gonna be a long one, so bounce now if [...]

Okay, this is gonna be a long one, so bounce now if you're not in for a read.
I'm a teacher, and I'm tired. I'm tired of people thinking they know what it's like to do my job.
I'm tired of hearing "I was in school once, so I know..." or "teachers love this extra time off."

First off, it's not easy time, or extra time off. We're not sitting around doing nothing all day.
I'm still planning, delivering lessons, marking, preparing, & more.
While people try & talk about teachers "sitting around collecting a paycheque," here's what life is like for me.

Last year, when in-school classes were cancelled, I had a week to try and completely rework the way I teach the curriculum, to make it as effective as possible in as little time as possible.
I'm lucky, because I'm pretty tech-savvy. Many aren't, and had a real quick wake up call.

For me, I knew my best teaching was in the classroom, so I went, everyday, and sat in an empty room in an empty school, meeting with students online, planning and delivering lessons.
For a teacher, it's a soul crushing world to be in an empty room with no energy.

As the year wound down, I hoped things would be back to normal by September, but knew they likely wouldn't be.
September hit, and it became a whole new world.

I'm used to dealing with students having personal issues. I'm used to helping angry students who feel the world is out to get them.
Now, with the new measures in, I also get to work with parents who think the world is out to get them.

Don't get me wrong, those parents have EVERY right to be upset with what is happening. Like us, there is a lot of fear and concern out there.
So when I have to send a kid home because he isn't feeling good, I almost expect the backlash.

Please understand, that when a kid is sent home sick right now, we know how unpredictable and aggravating it can be.
On one hand, we get to deal with parents who get furious because they need to now take time off work. I understand that anger. I smile, and keep my patience.

On the other hand, I also have parents who are absolutely terrified of anything resembling a sniffle coming into the classroom. When they hear a kid was sick and NOT sent home, there is anger and confusion.
Being in the center, I get to feel that from both sides.

Meanwhile, in the class, I have dozens of kids who are coming with their own baggage, who are also bringing in mixed messages. Part of my job is managing the fear and unease that so many kids have about what is happening, and the unknown behind it.

Attach that to also managing the kids who believe it's a scam, and don't feel they need to follow the rules, which causes tension.
And of course those in the middle, who don't know what to think and feel the pressure of being pulled to one side or another.

These kids are also bringing in their own past scars, and now many new ones, created by the isolation and helplessness they have felt.

If a kid is sick in my class and not sent home, and a spread happens, that's on me. If a kid isn't COVID positive, and is sent home to be cautious, also on me.

That's just the emotional aspect.
Academically, this year there is the normal variance between learning levels and abilities, much of which has now been enhanced with the extra time not in a classroom. Some kids are afraid they won't be able to catch up.

For many, it is going to take time to catch up.
Meanwhile, we're planning for in-class learning, as, normal, except now I'm also making sure I'm planning learning activities for any kids who have to stay home, which can be 1 student, 3, 5, etc.

Delivering a meaningful lesson in class is one thing. Doing it through online is another. Trying to do both at the same time, week in and week out is exhausting.

Trying to accurately assess the same material for a group of kids in a class and out is more difficult than you may understand.

This is all just the basics, as well not going to bother getting into the extra challenges from lacking government support in this thread, other than to say it's also a massive gut punch.

On top of all of this, there is also the different range of emotions between teachers themselves.

Through it all, I try to simplify things into this:
1) Make all the kids feel safe and welcome.
2) Make the parents feel their kids are safe and welcome.
3) Don't show how it's affecting me, so as not to frighten the kids or affect their learning.

I'll be fully honest. For the first time, I started talking to a councillor this year. I hit all the target points for having what doctors described as a "major depressive episode," heavily influenced by what was happening in my job. I've never had that before.

I had days last year where I had to lie in the middle of the floor of my empty classroom just to collect myself and stop the anxiety and whirling before I had to turn on the camera.

Please note, this isn't a "woe is me" thread, though some will take it that way. I love my job. I've always said teaching isn't a career, it's a lifestyle, and I mean every word of that.

The purpose isn't to seek pity. I don't need that.

I'm just sick and tired of people thinking my job is easy.
Yes, I know many jobs are difficult, and this isn't to diminish those, either. I feel for all of you working out there, and I will not judge the difficulty of someone else's job until I've done it myself.

My job isn't harder or easier than yours, but comes with it's own challenges. Those challenges, like many of yours, are incredibly heavy.
I refuse to judge your job if I haven't done it. I hope you'll show the same respect to mine.
Anyways, that's the rant.
I wish you all well.

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