I have had nothing to eat today so i'm gonna go eat.
Maybe i'll open up about more stuff in the future but...again, right now, i know if i push it anymore, it's gonna send me into that state again and i just...I can't do it, i won't be able to get help rn if i fall back into that so...Again, sorry...
Just know i love you and i care about you all very much. I understand if you all unfollow, i don't feel like i deserve a platform anyway and i've been contemplating deleting all of my stuff for days now. (I'm not going to but...the thoughts are there...They really still are...)
I want to draw and do art and help people with my art.
I want to have my dreams come true, i learned how to draw and write to do these things with my characters...but i feel more and more and more lately like i don't deserve that and...I'm trying to not fall to these thoughts...
I want to have my dreams come true, i learned how to draw and write to do these things with my characters...but i feel more and more and more lately like i don't deserve that and...I'm trying to not fall to these thoughts...
Everytime i talk about my mental health, it feels like im making stuff about me when i don't want to do that, it feels like im just a burden and a problem for others listening...No matter how much they love me or care about me...
You wanna know why Sharky is such a big comfort character for me? Because just like him, i fucking hate myself. And...I've been trying to use my care for him as means to get myself to try and self care more...Just like him, my friends care about me and i care about them and i-
Don't want them worrying about me...Which is why i have to keep trying to change and care about myself...That's alot of his arc actually. Acceptance of himself and i guess i'm going through accepting myself right now for my own mental sakes...
I know, rambling again, blah blah blah Sharksa, yeah...I just...I guess i need to put this all somewhere because...I've never been this close to breaking points in my entire life and im trying so fucking hard so...Yeah...
...I should go eat and i should try and relax and sleep...
Again, i'm sorry for everything...
Again, i'm sorry for everything...