one black president.
one.
and they lost their damned minds.
one!
one in a 219-year chain of events.
just one!
and they totally lost their shit.

*one*

and it was the least scary one. like, on purpose, we picked the black guy who loans you a lawnmower and not the guy who's going to remind you that racism is pretty bad and systemic, and yet, the one -- with the fancy degrees and the slick way of talking.

and they still lost it!

the dude you lost your *minds* over.
this dude.
him.
the dude with the *helmet*.

america: you can have a black president

us: hoooray!

america: but he's gotta be safe. and kind of corny. not scary at all. like, the super safest guy. very safe.

us: *puts away malcolm x poster* fine. we pick this one.

america: we are now more racist and insane.

also lucky for us we dodged all the drama and uncertainty that would have happened if we picked a WOMAN to be president