Dear healthy people: Please stop thinking the chronically ill can change our physical reality with a positive mental attitude. When we say we can't do something, it isn't defeatism or self pity. It's us trying to realistically assess our abilities and avoid damaging ourselves.

We can't just "toughen up". Debilitated muscles and joints and nerves do not "get used to" strenuous activity. They degenerate further and cause PAIN. When you try to push us, we often internalize it and we end up trying to force ourselves to do things we shouldn't. It HURTS.

Just fuckin BELIEVE US. This isn't fourth grade. We're not trying to get out of school.

I know it's not easy to accept that someone you love is in a constant struggle that will never end. But when our loved ones can't accept us as we are, we end up not just sick but alone too.