Just a few days before Christmas, all the strains of coronaviruses had an urgent top-secret board meeting. Important matters needed to be discussed. Crucial decisions to be made.
On the 20th of December… https://twitter.com/Lyndonx/status/1345852827625730048

Nosey Covid (Opened the drawer on the advent calendar): Board meeting today!!
Lazy Covid (Yawning): What’s on the agenda?
Tuffy Covid: 1) Ruin Christmas for humans!!! 2) Scare the life out of them. 3)Threaten their very existence 4) Control them.

Handy Covid: Easy-peasy. We just go on all Christmas gifts wrapping papers. The best way to get into every home. They can't disinfect paper!

Poet Covid: To be or not to be, that is the question? Our survival depends on our ability to control them. Without hosts to control, we shall perish from existence.

Alchemist Covid: I say we invent a new strain. We call it the “new variant”. Let’s say it’s the deadliest one of all.

Natural Covid: Do we need to invent fake stories? Why not let nature run its full course? Nature makes everything fall in its right place, at the right time.

Brainy Covid: Nonsense. I can fabricate some graphs to show people how deadly this variant can be. That’ll scare them out of their wits.

Baker Covid: I have an idea! I can bake scrumptious cookies to infect that jolly old fat vulnerable fool. Easy target! He just wants to make all the kids happy. Let’s get rid of him once and for all and crush the kids’ spirits.

Clockwork Covid: I- must- infect… I -must -infect… Anything- I -see- I -must- infect

Doctor Covid: We must be aware of the medicine these ingenious humans are using. A few seem quite promising. We must crush them. We must block them at every point: research, prescription, transportation, & delivery. We must not allow them to be accessible nor available to humans.

Finance Covid: We could say that this new variant can stick on all paper money. I envision a new way of payment. The digital currency! It will allow us to track every human’s little move. We’ll have them exactly where we want them, then.

People after all need money to buy food. It won’t be too hard to shift them completely to this new monetary system. They’ll be easy targets. We'll give them some free digital money first just to lure them in and then we trap them.

King Covid: So how do we launch our new variant then? How do we scare the life out of humans just before Christmas?

Editor Covid: No problem. Just dictate the narrative to me and I will publish it verbatim. Your wish is my command. Chiching $$$$$$$$

Sneezy Covid: A-A-A-Achoum!!

Party Planner Covid: I can get this organised for you in no time!! Shall we say the 21st of December? There is no better time than now. I need the wrapping paper, scissors, tape, little cards… I’m on it.

Paranoid Covid: Are you sure guys we can pull this? What if they find out our little plot? What if humans realise that the test can’t tell whether we are infectious or not? What if they realise that immunity is long-lasting after natural infection? or that we are not that deadly?

What if they realise that they are not all susceptible to the new variant? -Well, we’ve kind of been around for a while now. What if they figure out that exposure to the sun can protect them? What if they don’t buy that story about healthy people infecting others magically?

Clumsy Covid: Oops! I just pressed enter and leaked the minutes of our board meeting. Sorry! Damned butterfingers of mine!

Clueless Covid: So are we doing this or are we not doing this tomorrow?

Policeman Covid: Let’s do this. I’ll make sure to crush any insurgence. The humans must obey. They will obey.

Papa Covid: You take too much pleasure fooling people. You must be mindful that your actions will come back to get you. We’re just the common cold. We will never be as deadly as heart disease or cancer or diabetes.

The truth will prevail. You must stop this farce and be more sensible. Find some true purpose for your lives instead of trying to meddle with the human’s lives. If your conscience is dormant, jolt it. Now let nature run its course.
-The End-

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